tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-79988632644803315712024-02-20T13:51:19.893-08:00the mirror doesn't lietrey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.comBlogger31125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-24208123468537156522011-09-14T14:39:00.000-07:002011-09-14T14:46:43.659-07:00Dean or Grant?<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; font-size:medium;"> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:12.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Are you attracted to the Dean or the Grant? Do you want he bad boy or the gentleman?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">James Dean's </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Rebel Without a Cause</span></i></span><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> made him into the icon of his generation. His character defiantly rejected the values of his elders while desperately aching to “belong” and attempting to find a purpose in life. Dean's performance spoke on behalf of disenchanted, disenfranchised teenagers and gave them a hero they could respect and admire. Dean only lived long enough to complete three films, the latter being </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">East of Eden</span></i></span><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">, </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Giant,</span></i></span><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> all in the two years of 1955-56. His premature death in a car crash at the age of 24 cemented his legendary status. So, is it better to burn out then fade away?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Cary Grant was known for his combination of virility, sexuality and the stand-up gentleman. He had invented a man-of-the-world persona. Although, he appeared in 72 films in his lifetime he is best remembered for </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">An Affair to Remember, To Catch a Thief </span></i></span><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">and</span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> North by Northwest</span></i></span><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">. He retired from film at 62 and he lived to be 82 years old. Once told by an interviewer, "Everybody would like to be Cary Grant," Grant is said to have replied, "So would I." So, a gentleman lives longer than the rebel but has a more persistent and somewhat boring life?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Why are most women attracted to the unstable bad boys more often than the nice guys? Mystery, uncertainty, adventure? But it is a double edged sword since you also want to eventually settle down. Some women think they can tame the wild or fix the broken...give it up and move on. You want crazy you can get it but don't try to kill the very thing that attracted you in the first place. You are never going to change us. You be you and let us be us...nice guy or bad boy...we are who we are.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Women like the wild side that their parents warned them against. No one wants boring. If a woman labels you a, “nice guy,” you can throw away your chance of ever being anything more than her friend because she is not attracted to you. You don’t want to be a nice guy. Nice guys are stuck in the “friend zone” category. As a nice guy you may have a lot of women friends. That is fine if that is all you want. However, if you can balance the good with the bad you can get anywhere.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Just like the majority, men want a lady in life and a wildcat behind closed doors. Similarly, most women like the gentleman in public and the bad boy in private.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The chain smoking life of the party womanizing drunk is always going to be that. The polite, stable, financially secure, play it safe and do it all by the books man will always be that. We are a direct product of where we came from and our parents molded us in the way they wanted us to be. It is hard to shake and break the mold.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">There are plenty of Deans and Grants for all of you women out there, but choose wisely. The older you get the shorter the return policy. So, my advice to you women is to STOP caring. Don't always make yourself available. Most people want what they can’t have. The good guys will have to take initiative and break out a little or he won't. The bad boy will have to take you seriously and show respect or he won't. You can't change people but you can change your reaction to them. You can also show respect for yourself and demand what you want. Whether you are a Betty or Veronica or a Ginger or Maryanne, or whether you are attracted to the Dean or the Grant…none of us truly fit a single stereotype. The best thing you can do is be yourself and put out there what you want to get back. Communicate = reciprocate. If not, delete.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:ArialMT;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">By Trey Mitchell</span></i></b></span><span style="font-size:11.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p> <!--EndFragment--> </span></span></div>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-30309114578751985892011-09-12T15:43:00.001-07:002011-09-12T15:45:30.568-07:00R 'n'R<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Excess ain't rebellion.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">You're drinking what they're selling.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Your self-destruction doesn't hurt them.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Your chaos won't convert them.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">They're so happy to rebuild it.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">You'll never really kill it.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Yeah, excess ain't rebellion.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">You're drinking what they're selling.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Rock'n'Roll Lifestyle</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Cake</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll go together like America, apple pie and baseball. The latter obviously seems more wholesome. Since the beginning of the ‘devil’s music’ the extreme has been a conglomerate of all things that heighten the senses and take you to another level of consciousness and sometimes unconsciousness. RnR is a lifestyle as much as it can be a cocktail of disaster. It defines living on the edge.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Rock ‘n’ roll fuels the industry of fashion, delivers a broad range of unique attitudes and sparks its own language. Of course, the music, sex and drugs create a lifestyle that is hard to ignore. Hard-drinking and hard-living are usually synonymous in the lifestyle. Musicians have always attracted "groupies" which seems to be a perk of fame. They spend most of their time with and often do sexual favors for band members. What guy wouldn't want that right? They are usually chasing the same high of being on stage as they do when off stage. Who wants to be normal when they can be a rock star 24/7?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Groupies have a self-appointed job description of being 'available' to celebrities, pop stars, rock stars, politicians and other public figures. Nancy Spungen (Sid & Nancy), Cynthia Plaster Caster and Pamela Des Barres (of the GTO’s), in particular are probably the best known rock n roll groupies. Another type of groupie was the young girls who dominated the backstage scene in the seventies. The best known were Sable Star, Lori Maddox and Geraldine Edwards, who was the inspiration for Penny Lane in Almost Famous.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">Whether you are more like Janis Joplin or Jim Morrison losing your religion can mean losing everything. In reality, there is no such thing as money for nothing and chicks for free. We are all selling as well as buying. It is simple supply and demand and there is plenty of bad that feels so good. However, the law of average dictates that if we do anything long enough we can fall victim to it. When the drugs are not working anymore, you have no idea if the sex you had the night before was good or not and your creativity has evaporated, it might be time to get a new mirror and hope you can see more clearly. Everything we do has consequences. We all make mistakes but we should only regret the ones we do not learn from. Is it really better to burn out than fade away?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">What do you want? I want Rock ‘n’ Roll!</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><br /></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"> </span></span></span></b><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;"><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span></span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#99FFFF;">By Trey Mitchell </span></span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p> </p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-42703501694164856392011-08-12T18:17:00.000-07:002011-08-12T18:20:00.017-07:00DRAMARAMA<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 16px;font-size:11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: normal; font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">There are people of all ages seem to incite mayhem. Some do it on purpose and others unintentionally. For others, life without it would be boring. No matter</span></span><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> if you're in high school or in your 60's or whether you live in Laguna Beach or at Melrose Place, in real life the drama must go! </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></div><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><i><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">D</span></i></strong><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">on’t be stupid</span></em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">
<br /></span></em></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">I know it is hard to imagine but don't assume <em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">anything</span></em>. Hearsay is gossip. Do you remember the exercise from grade school that demonstrated miscommunication? You started on one side of the room with a simple phrase and each person had to repeat it to the next and in the end it was nothing like it began. He-said she-said equals nothing without facts. Go straight to the source before you get upset that you heard that your ex cheated on you with your sister's ex while they were away on vacation and happened to run into each other while drunk at an amusement park, singing Barry Manilow songs to some pigeons. Think before you act.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><i><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">R</span></i></strong><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">eaction distraction</span></em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">This just perpetuates the non-existent issue at hand. When you react without thinking things through, emotions run the brain. Logical thinking is not emotional thinking. Suddenly you are wrapped up in the momentum of the drama because you did not stop and think when you had the chance. Guess what -knows-where and past any point of return. Why jump off the bridge before looking to see what you are jumping into or walk blindfolded into traffic? Just blame the messenger nothing at this point is your fault.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><i><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">A</span></i></strong><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">ct like an adult</span></em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">
<br /></span></em></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">There is a logical reason for everything if you choose to take the time to let the fog clear. Treat people the way you want to be treated. You get back the energy and attitude you put out there. Maturity does not just mean working and taking care of bills, it also means respecting yourself as well as others.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><i><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">M</span></i></strong><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">ind over matter</span></em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Some things are easier said than done. The heart and the mind often conflict one another. The heart may heal but the mind does not always forget. Sometimes the hardest things and the right things are the same. The immediate pain is easier to deal with than long term pain. Sometimes letting go of a feeling is freeing. So what if Julie called you a bitch. Anger usually comes from hurt. You can't control other's actions but you can control your reaction to them. Take the high road and enjoy the view. It is always better than looking from the bottom up.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><i><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">A</span></i></strong><em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;">s you were</span></em><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-size:100%;"><span>Life goes on. The majority of drama occurs over things that really don't make much of a difference in the long run. What may seem like a monumental issue at the time later seems just silly. The longer you live and the more you experience the less the trivial things matter. Your first heartbreak usually makes you feel like dying and the end of the world. However, the more you date, love and lose, the more you realize that what is next is more important than what was.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">Sometimes I like a good drama or even dramedy on the silver screen. It can be attractive and glamorous from afar but in real life it is just a waste of time and energy.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">
<br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;"> </span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;"><span style="font-size:100%;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b></p><p> </p></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-48781033900406476252011-03-31T14:30:00.001-07:002011-04-14T06:33:22.817-07:00The Next Chapter<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><br /><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Forgiveness is giving up all hope of a better past.</span></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Let’s face it love can be painful but it doesn't have to be. I have been both the heartbreaker and the heart broken more times than I can count. If you care about the person at all neither way is a joy ride. I know how hard it is to not love someone that loves you and how painful it is to love someone that doesn't love you.</span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I recently had a friend tell me 'take your own advice'. So I went back and read through much of my writing. I had lost clarity of the very things that I shared and encouraged in others. Sometimes the teacher must become the student. I am constantly giving others advice because it is easier to analyze other people's lives than my own. I write as a form of self therapy and often I let my thoughts vanish as soon as they hit the page. It is never too late to hold the mirror to yourself and take time to improve yourself since we all have room for improvement. We are lucky if we have someone else willing to help us.</span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"></span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We should always do things with the best of intentions and not for selfish reasons because when we expect things in return we set ourselves up for disappointment. It is selfish so if you want to always get something back then do things for yourself. It is easy to be selfish and prideful and let our own wants and needs stand in the way of accepting the efforts of another. It is never easy to admit when we are wrong but we mistakes on a daily basis.</span></span> </p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"></span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We can allow society to glamorize love but in reality a relationship takes effort, communication and trust. I don't care how 'easy' any relationship seems, it takes work. Once you get past the newness or honeymoon phase it is a daily task to feed love's hunger.</span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:Tahoma;"></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">No matter how much you love someone if they do not meet you halfway, then you are both unfulfilled. We all deserve love but we must not deny ourselves the happiness we are due if the other is not willing to give back.</span></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">It is important to maintain your own life so that when you break up you don't have to split up or choose friends. If you just fold into someone else's life and put all of your eggs in one basket you could lose them all. You can share most everything but you must keep something for yourself whether it is a set of friends or a hobby. You can't disappear into the life of another.</span></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Love is euphoric so when it is gone you go through withdrawals as if you quit a drug cold turkey. A buddy of mine mentioned recently how strange it is that we had known each other for 11 years and that when he and his girlfriend of a year broke up, he did not know how to even get through a day without her. When someone is so ingrained in your life then suddenly it is a desolate feeling.</span></span> </p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">All relationships take work even the new or easy ones. The engine of a car is like the heart and communication is the oil of the engine. Without communication the engine will get too hot too fast and burn up. Then you have a car without a heart.</span></span> </p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Breakups are emotional and if you really love someone then it takes time and space for the rational thoughts to kick in. How, when or why we get to the point of the break up is irrelevant but what we do afterwards is just as important. There is usually a 'misery' phase, an 'anger' phase, a 'what could I have done differently' phase, the 'missing' phase and lastly the 'move on and heal' phase.</span></span> </p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">No matter how much pain you are in it is not acceptable to hurt back. If it is the only way to get a reaction it is wrong and unhealthy. You can't make anyone do, say or feel what you want. One can only be to you what they allow and you can neither demand nor expect more. You can be the most important thing in someone’s life but not the only thing. No matter how diligent you are when a relationship ends it is almost impossible to remain close right away. You must learn every day life without each other. You learn to be without or you realize it is worth fighting for. Either way, there is no point in one person missing out when you can possibly both have your needs meet by another.</span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Understand the pain you feel will not go away until you process it or block it out and return to it later. It will still be there. If you bounce from one relationship to another without emptying the drain it will begin to overflow. So vent, talk, cry, rant, scream, sit in silence and think about why you are hurt. Listen to music, write, paint, read, exercise, whatever it takes to get the processing over with. Be leery of distractions versus processing though. You can hide, mask skip over, rationalize the pain but it will be there until you deal with it.</span></span></p><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">You must get though the road block of pain to begin healing time will heal</span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">lean on friends and family. It is like mourning a death of a loved one, as it is a death of its own. If you never imagined them being gone, missing, absent from your life...then yes it is like a death.</span></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">You may hide in your room and mourn for a while, you have beat yourself up or have a pity party but eventually you must get back out and integrate yourself into life. Most of us have been in a car wreck but even if it takes time, we drive again.</span></span></p><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Losing everything allows you to see clearly that you have nothing to lose.</span></span></p><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"></span></span></div><br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">By Trey Mitchell</span></b></span></div><br /><p><span style="font-family:tahoma, sans-serif;"></span></p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-42870908417855377822011-01-30T19:35:00.001-08:002011-02-01T19:22:25.693-08:00Deal?<p style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; LINE-HEIGHT: 16px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66ff99;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; LINE-HEIGHT: 16px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66ff99;">Women want to be swept off their feet, wined and dined but real life is not a romance novel. When the 'honeymoon' phase is over reality sets in. Sometimes you only see when you want to see at first. I am who I am and what you see is what you get. I know I go against the majority but I feel you have to earn my trust, time and efforts. Don’t get me wrong, I don't think I am special and I am not a snob, although I am picky. I just think that you should invest and give more over time and not put on a show to impress. I do not care what you or anyone else thinks. I am ok with me, and if you don't like me, than let us not waste our time. Life is short and to spend it pretending to be someone you are not, it is a waste of time. If you want financial stability do it for yourself. I take care of me. I will give you everything I have if you meet me half way but don't expect me to give until your lofty expectations have been satisfied. I would not waste my time, money or energy if I did not care. So if I do, it is for real and I will go the distance. I will even go as far to let you go to find something better if I am not it for you. I want people to be happy and I will not stand in the way of that even to my own detriment. So walk on me and walk on. Love me and I will love back. Ignore me and you do not exist. If you stand on the mound, I will not only step up to the plate but also take a swing. If I give and you give back, it is a good damn start. I am not shallow, superficial or selfish. If I am not good enough for you so save us a lot of time and money and just say so .I will admit when I am wrong but you can't always be right. I am not going to say or doing anything unless I mean it. Is that too much ask of someone else? Don't manipulate me, use me for your own gain, lie to me, tell me to be something I am not, try to change me, or anything else selfish or degrading. How would you like to be treated in that manner? Don’t tell me to change for anyone else and if you do then how about you change for me. Do not tell me how creative, talented, how I have a good heart, how I am a catch. Tell me you love me and that you are not only in until something better comes along. I am not grass so there is always something greener. I am not your father, brother, therapist, counselor or caretaker. I am, not my car, my job, my house or my bank account. I have feelings and I express them, if you are not interested or have nothing to say, and then find someone else. I am heart, soul and hope. Don’t kiss my ass because I am no better than and do not put me down because you have problems too. I am tired of trying and want things to be easy and new. Let’s both check our luggage at the door, strip naked and talk. If something happens cool, if not cool too. I will not apologize for my feelings or how my past made me who I am. I will not blame my family, my religion or my ex. I have lived, I have faced adversity and I have survived. I do not deserve a medal or sympathy. I am here and I am not going anywhere.</span></span></p><p style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; LINE-HEIGHT: 16px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66ff99;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; LINE-HEIGHT: 16px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66ff99;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0px; LINE-HEIGHT: 16px; MARGIN: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 0px; PADDING-RIGHT: 0px"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66ff99;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></p>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-15765318193602047952011-01-25T14:05:00.000-08:002011-01-25T14:10:22.371-08:00<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><br /></span></span></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">I fell with you when you fell into me</span></span></b></span><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><br /></span></span></b></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">To be alone, truly alone and keep your heart to yourself can be the most difficult, yet most rewarding thing you can ever do. Being alone and being lonely aren't equivalent, nor are they mutually exclusive. Sometimes the heart races faster and the brain lags behind struggling to catch up. When a relationship ends the healthiest thing to do is to take the time to heal and reflect. To jump into another is a pitfall. You cannot move on if you carry along any part of the unresolved past. No matter if you are aware or not, you always do carry something with you. The heart can heal quickly but the mind has a longer memory.</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Sometimes working on a relationship is too difficult and starting a new one seems easier. Even if you choose the latter every relationship takes work. The beginning of every new relationship is always exciting and euphoric but to have the ability to love does not mean you should easily share it. People should earn your love along with respect. It usually feels perfect at first, like it is just 'meant to be'. That is usually when the heart falls as the brain freezes. You must set healthy boundaries to keep the relationship on a healthy course and at a healthy pace.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">We all just want to be loved, yet eventually you must deal with reality and this can take longer for some than others. From the start it is easy to see only good and we can be blinded to red flags. When we do see these flags we often think the person will change or that we can change them. This is an illusion. People rarely change the way you want them to or in the time you wish. Compromise is when two people make mutual decisions not when one wants the other to change. When one wants change and the other does not abide, this causes wounded feelings.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">When someone has moved on before the relationship is over, which most often occurs, both people become unhappy trying to make something fit, or they are simply scared to be alone or hurt the other’s feelings. When one party finally breeches the subject the other can feel everything from shock, disappointment, regret, hurt, sadness, anger, and so on. No one wants to be rejected and the initial letdown can send your emotions into a tailspin. It is an emotional situation and even in the end communication is key. Pain comes from not getting what you want. Take it slow so the mind can steer the heart and the pain in a rational manner. If you give everything and the other does not meet you half way then it is not worth it; if they won't or they can't meet your desires then you cannot make someone do so. When we were young we had less experience so we threw our heart with reckless abandon and no concept of reactions or consequences. That first heartbreak can feel like the end of the world. That feeling of disappointment never gets easier emotionally, however, our brain learns how to better deal with the results of our efforts.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Don’t let someone else set the pace of your relationship. If you are always there for them it sets a precedent. It is okay if you have a busy job, kids or social life and are not always available. This way you can weed out the ones that do not have the patience. On the other hand, there are times you do not respond quickly then it can make someone feel neglected or pushed away. There is something appealing about wanting. If you always get what you want, when you want, you can take it for granted. The deeper you get into a relationship the more taxing it can become to get out. The slower you go the easier it is to more clearly see things. It is like driving somewhere then going back and walking it. You see more details than when you were speeding by with your eyes focused on the road ahead.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">You would think that dating and love become easier but it does not. There are even more variables as we get older as well as we are stubborn and set in our ways. People grown along side each other or they apart. 'The Missing Piece Meets the Big O' by Shell Silverstein, states we must be whole to be in a healthy relationship. You can neither fill your hole with what is missing nor give yourself away leaving a hole. The idea is to be whole and find someone that is also whole. Relationships are built on friendship and maintained by communication.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">If you are the type of person that does not communicate well, it is difficult to have a healthy relationship. If you bottle your thoughts and emotions you might blow up when overwhelmed. If you are the type to keep things inside your head and write a letter because that is easier than talking directly to them, then don't expect an immediate response. It took you awhile to get your thoughts down on paper and it also takes someone time to digest and respond when hit with so much at once.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Relationships end in many different ways. When one moves on right away, they often try to soften the blow by telling you how ‘wonderful’ you and that you ‘deserve’ better and that ‘you will find someone’, and usually it is sincere. Of course, it hurts to hear that because it can make you feel like you were not good enough. It is also very difficult to remain close friends right away because you need someone to talk to about how you are dealing with the change. Remaining friends is not always easy to do because it can cause sadness, regret and guilt. You tend to run through all the things in your mind you wish you could have done differently. Life is full of could have, should have and would haves.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">We all have our purpose in each other's lives. The hard part is accepting that role even if it is not the role we want. </span></span></span><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><br /></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"> </span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Tahoma;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></b></span><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style=" ;font-family:Times-Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"> </span></span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment-->trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-84609568259110583142011-01-12T14:18:00.000-08:002011-01-12T14:19:39.034-08:00Get Smart<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><b><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;"><br /></span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">I made a comment to a friend recently that either I have commitment issues or I date women that do. Maybe if I dated women that had commitment issues when I had them as well, then we would both get what we wanted, which is nothing. You can't make someone love you and vice-versa and timing becomes more of an issue the older you get. You can't give what you do not have and you can't depend on someone else to fill in what you are missing. If you are unhappy with yourself take the time to find it for yourself, within yourself. Unhappiness can be contagious since misery loves company. To vent is one thing but to project is another. It is easier to be pulled down than to lift someone up. A life preserver is designed for only one person. Relationships should be an open smooth concrete two-way highway not a rough dirt one lane winding mountain road.</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">There are so many variables when is comes to dating and the longer we are out there roaming, the heavier the baggage feels. It is like living in one place for a long time and it is not until you move that you realize how much useless stuff you have accumulated. You are lucky if you find someone that truly accepts you along with all of your faults. When you are with someone you must accept all that comes with them whether it is a child or a dog or an ex-husband or ex-wife. As well, it is always said you don't just date them but you date their family. That includes every trait or fault you inherit. I once heard someone say that in your current relationship you must deal with everything that the person they dated before you screwed up. To some degree I concur, since we are a product of our past. That includes insecurities and triggers of past sadness or happiness. Each previous relationship is like a car wreck whether a fender bender or your car was totaled. Otherwise, you would not have moved on. Most of the time we face our fears and climb back into a car and drive again. We might drive with more caution but we still do it. If you fall and hurt yourself do you never try to walk again? I always say it is like looking for your keys and finding them in the last place you looked. Why would you keep looking for them if you already found them? The grass is infinitely greener.</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">We all have scars but not all are visible. They remain for a reason and I believe it is to remind us that we survived. There is something endearing, triumphant and heroic about survivors. Those that overcome adversity have a strength that others do not possess. Prior to hardship most of us do not even know we have that in us since, it has not been utilized before. I have an attraction to those that have suffered yet risen from being a victim and take pride in being a survivor. Usually those people have a desire to share their stories so that others learn from their mistakes. After all, we can learn from others' mistakes so that we do not make the same. Some will argue that we must all make our own mistakes and I will not argue with that but we can also avoid some by learning from others. At the same time, I only think that we have regrets if we do not learn from those mistakes. I really do believe that everything happens for a reason. Unfortunately, we are often left with questions and not all questions can or must be answered. Sometimes we must find closure for ourselves and not depend on others to provide for us.</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">Change is difficult when we are not in control of it. So I always strive for minor changes, so that when those that come along that are out of my control I can be better prepared to deal with them. At the same time we each must remain responsible for our actions and understand that our actions affect those around us. Hopefully we learn to have the foresight to be respectful of those in our lives, especially the ones closest to us. What you put out there is what you get back. People respond to how you feel about yourself. If you respect yourself others will notice. Respect from others is earned and not handed out for free. It comes to those that are deserving of it. Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you. You do not need a mirror to know who you are. All it takes is time with yourself, not by yourself. It is empowering to possess the ability to stand on your own. Often we hide from ourselves in people and things around us. It is easy to be distracted to avoid dealing with some things but when we do face them we can confidence and self-worth. </span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">We are born unbiased and non-judgmental. Unfortunately these are learned behaviors. It is often stated that we enter the world the same way we leave it and coming or going, we have nothing. In the end all we have is our relationships and experiences. Make sure those closest to you know how you feel about them. Do not take any relationship for granted. Make every word and action count. We have no idea how many lives we affect on a daily basis. Seize the day, savor the moment and revel in the possibilities. When you are gone, what is the one thing you want to be remembered for?</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;"> </span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;"><br /></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66FF99;">- Trey Mitchell</span></p></b></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-77999811904207672332011-01-12T14:17:00.000-08:002011-01-12T14:18:03.747-08:00Stupid Crazy<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial; font-size: small; "><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;">Women are crazy and men are stupid. Italians make the best lovers, gay men are all whores, all black men cheat and Brazilian woman are the most beautiful in the world. Now that we have some stereotypes out of the way let's talk about some truths.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />As a whole, women are more of an emotional rollercoaster due to monthly hormonal cycles and if they are pregnant the ride is even more intense. Men are less emotional and more reserved with their feelings as we hide them as some badge of strength. We are at opposite ends of the emotional spectrum so it is understandable that we view the opposite sex as almost alien.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />So, if one of us has to be labeled then the other must accept the label as well. I can’t tell you how many times I have heard one call the other out and neither deny the other’s stereotype. After all, it is only fair that we share.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />Common sense tells us that these are extreme generalizations of the opposite sex. Men can be crazy in our own way and women can be stupid as well. The bottom line is that we express ourselves in very different ways. We must learn to bridge the gap between emotional outpouring and emotional absence. We may be stupid when we do not listen and you may be crazy when you are irrational.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />There are far too many advertisements (Pizza Hut, AT&T, Whiskas, Sony), books (She's Come Undone by Wally lamb, The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, Girl Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen, songs ('Crazy Bitch' by Buckcherry) and television/movies ('Two and a Half Men', 'Fatal Attraction', 'Single White Female' and most reality shows) that feed into these blind labels. We need more realistic and honest demonstrations of communication and understanding. Women tend to think out loud as where we tend to internalize. Women must take the time to ask questions and we must take the time to not just hear but listen. Usually women tell us what they want and at times we expect them to be mind-readers.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />Life is full of choices and we can either accept things or change them. If you care about someone and they constantly hear that they are stupid or crazy, after a while you start to believe it as true. Do not reinforce negativity and defend them and their right to express themselves as they wish. We must take the time to learn when, what, how and why and to communication transparently is the only way.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br />Would you rather be stupid or crazy?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><br /></span></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;">by Trey Mitchell</span></b></div></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-62734464668139525422011-01-12T14:14:00.000-08:002011-01-12T14:17:07.030-08:00Sex by Number<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><br /></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">We know men are promiscuous by nature. It’s part of the genetic makeup that originally helped men spread their seed. It was different for women, who had to go through having a baby and then nurturing it. Women are genetically programmed to want just one man to help raise their children.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Thus, the age old question always seems to arise at some point in most modern relationships: ‘How many partners have you had?’</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">So with this question in mind I researched to find the average number of sexual partners for men and women. The first statistic and most commonly found on the Internet states that the average number of sexual partners for men in USA is 11. Upon further research I found contradicting information.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">A 2005 survey states the average number of sexual partners for women was 8.6. The average number for men was 31.9.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">A 2007 survey states that 29 percent of American men report having 15 or more female sexual partners in a lifetime, while only 9 percent of women report having sex with 15 or more men.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">In a 2008 survey 21 percent of the men and 15 percent of the women admitted they had lied and/or they had provided an inaccurate partner count.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">So how can any of these surveys possibly reflect true average numbers?</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">At one point I actually found a calculator to tell you if you are over or under average in your respected sexual numbers: </span><a href="http://www.calculatorslive.com/Average-Number-Of-Sexual-Partners-Calculator.aspx" target="_blank"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">http://www.calculatorslive.<wbr>com/Average-Number-Of-Sexual-<wbr>Partners-Calculator.aspx</span></a></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">So do men lie to inflate their sexual reputations or do women lie to downplay their sexual experience?</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">A man may believe that he should have a lot of partners and may feel compelled to exaggerate. However, a woman, believing that she should have fewer partners, may minimize her past. </span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Women are said to rely more on enumeration and most often are able to list each of their past partners by name which typically leads to underestimating while men tend to be more vague which leads to exaggeration.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">So with all of this in mind, does the number of sexual partners have any bearing on a current relationship?</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">In my opinion nothing good can come of this discussion. The past can cloud the future so why ruin a mostly sunny forecast?</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">It is the snowball effect. First you compare numbers, and then you open the door for more curiosity on every level. More and more questions come to mind and suddenly insecurities arise. The past may be the pathway that lead to where you are now but the now is more relevant to the future.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">Sex is not a competition. You neither win nor lose with a higher or lower number of partners. It never worked out with anyone you were previously with or you would still be with them. Focus on the one you are with and develop, explore, experiment and revel in every moment. There is no point in missing what you already had when you might be missing out on what you have right now.</span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">No matter what the number, if you count backwards you still reach number one. That is who you are with now and who doesn’t want to be number one!?</span></p><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;"><br /></span></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CCCCCC;">by Trey Mitchell</span></b></div></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-37391029235407913042011-01-12T14:10:00.000-08:002011-01-12T14:16:45.851-08:00Defining Moments<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I don't think you can put an expiration date on a label-free relationship or even a milestone like a 'Seven Year Itch' or 'DTR90' (define the relationship at 90 days). Each relationship occurs at a different rate. There are many variables: coming out of a long term relationship, just got divorced, deciding to focus on career or kids or even loss a spouse to death, etc. As well, new relationships accelerate at different speeds. If you spend a lot of time with someone or take your time and see them very little in the beginning, it sets the pace to get to a defining point.</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br />I think there are more important factors other than time that should create the defining moment:<br /><br />- When the four letter word ‘love’ is first uttered from either person’s lips things change.<br /><br />- If you are having sex with more than one partner it is important to have ‘the talk’.<br /><br />- If there are kids in the mix the conversation might need to take place sooner since it concerns more than just the two of you.<br /><br />- If you are looking for a serious relationship even before the two of you meet it is a good idea to make sure you are on the same page.<br /><br />- If you know that fun is the main goal and the last thing you want or have time for is a relationship, speak up.<br /><br /><br />Even though these top the list of reasons to define your relationship with or without a cliché filled timeline, there are those that have no interest in definitions. Unfortunately these are usually due to hidden reasons:<br /><br />- They are seeing someone else and don’t want to commit to one person, or will choose one over the other when the time comes.<br /><br />- It could be complicated and when you have yet to find closure and the idea of a new beginning is too much to handle.<br /><br />- They are overprotective of their heart due to past hurt whether it was recent or the result of many attempts leading to bitterness and disappointment.<br /><br />- Sometimes there is the tendency to believe the grass is always greener and have expectations too high.<br /><br />- They might be in it for the chase and when you fully give in they no longer find it enough to hold their interest.</span></span></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br />No matter how, when or if you define a relationship there is a natural instinct to have security by knowing where you stand. Actions do not always tell us what we what to know. You can mislead others or be misled by actions and even words. However, at some point communication on a need to know basis is imperative to sustain a healthy relationship. At some point 'in or out' is important so you can get on with your life either together or separately.</span></span></p><p></p><p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#339999;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /><br /><br /></span></span></p><div><br /></div></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-90495318827299192592010-11-28T14:30:00.001-08:002010-11-28T14:35:10.123-08:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 16px; font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;"><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I'm single and sad. :(</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: sorry. but the show must go on!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Yep! But, the show is going on without me!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: boo....ah, such is life...relationships are not easy...nor do i think they get easier the older you get...ups and downs...right people wrong time and wrong people right time. it is ok to do stupid things IN love but not FOR love.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I just hate change. I get used to people and routines and ways of life. I get too attached, and my identity gets involved. Good line.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: i think we all do that to a degree. some more than others. some more often than others</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Definitely some more than others. I don't do it often though, so when I do -- it's baaaad.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: well, thanks, i hope i pull some good ones out of my ass since i call myself a writer. i got ya...i used to be like that...id don't fall often but when i do it is long and hard i have commitment issues either way...too much or not enough. balance is the key.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I just don't know if it's even worth it. Is my sadness right now more than my happiness when I was happy? I think it might be. To me, that's not worth it. I'd rather just not feel anything again...I am always WAY too committed when I decide to be. </span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: ok, i call BS and it is understandable right now...but if you have a wreck do you never drive again? if you get too drunk do you never drink again? if your heart gets hurt do you never love again? i think you do, we all do. it is a never-ending search, it is the american way. the american dream.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: You're right. I just hate going from having a best friend that knows every move I make and everything that's going on in my life to not being able to contact that person at all. Why does it have to be like that? I'm still the same person; so is he. So why are we so different TODAY rather than 2 days ago???? I mean, I know the answer but it's just so sad to me...</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: you can, but it keeps the hurt going longer and it complicates everything.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: He was the one that I talked to when things were going shitty; now he's the one person I simply CAN'T talk to.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: i have done it many times....way more difficult but diff people deal with loss in diff ways</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I hope this situation turns out favorable. I'm not sure what I mean by that exactly, but that's what I'm praying for!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: lovers come and go but friends are forever...ok, family is forever but many friends, real friends will always be there. never put all your eggs in one basket...always keep a few for emergencies.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Absolutely. They remind me where my bootstraps are when I need to pick myself back up by 'em! My eggs are all stuck together, I think. They all go together from one basket to another. Very frustrating!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: just keep the two six-packs instead of the entire dozen.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Hahaha!! Very well said. :)</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: eggs are only stuck together if they are scrambled maybe go for poached next time or even better a single sunny side up!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Speaking of sunny, what a MISERABLE day to be feeling so sorry for myself! God, it's just so symbolic</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: no, just coincidence...it is all about perspective. i thought about this last night...if i could describe my outlook…or attitude it would be mostly sunny, light wind, H70 L45.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I just hope the last time I had with him isn't the last time I'll have with him. It is such a painful thought.... the "never again" this or the "never again" that.... torture. My high would be 85 I think. Low of probably 60. I'm pretty cold-natured.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: the best thing you can do for yourself is as a friend recently said to me...be a peacock show your colors, strut, stand tall proud and confident. it will be more attractive.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Yep! And just totally fake the hell out of it! I like it!!!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: be a true friend without expectations or judgment, show your ability to not need but want. we often are more attracted to the chase.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: Definitely without expectations. A lesson well-learned through the friendships of my years, but one that I learned to never take personally.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: the challenge. also, men have a hard time settling down...routine is boring. easy is lame. we need constant stimulation. Change.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: You are a wise man. Things didn't go down the way I wanted them to with this particular person -- the way I had envisioned -- and I'm not used to failing. I simply do not fail. Therefore the challenge is/has been presented, and I took it hook, line and sinker.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: you did not fail. takes two to tango. don't take it personally. sometimes things just don't work out and there is no one to blame. blame is lame anyway. bounce back woman. it is better to be alone than with the wrong person.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: I actually am consumed with the thought that he will NEVER be able to replace me. I'm a pretty fucking cool chick.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: and that is ok. better that than playing the loser, the victim or the failure. anyway, you get back what you put out there. positive attracts the same as well as negative attracts the same. be positive. live positive. life is too short to whine or wallow. when you can scream with joy and swim like a champion.</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: That's me! A champion! If you could see me now, I look like a champ! Yeah right!!!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">me: :) one day at a time....and remember, it could always be worse....waaaaaay worse. many of us lucky to have the chance to do anything other than just survive. we have the chance to thrive. have a great day!</span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFFFF;">HER: You fail at trying to be a hard-ass; you're an awesome person. Haha -- I know your secret. ;) Thanks.</span></p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-77228774863378579422010-05-18T13:34:00.000-07:002010-05-18T13:37:57.978-07:00Psychic<!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;color:#3366FF;"><b><br /></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">While I was home for my mother's birthday we watched </span></span></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">What Women Want</span></span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> , a romantic comedy starring Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt. I know I am behind on my watching of chick flicks. In this particular case I am about ten years behind. It is not that I dislike films that seem to cater more towards woman than men; it is more that I do not seek out this kind of film. It is not like when football season is over I spend those free nights at Blockbuster or loading up my Netflix queue debating whether or not I am more in the mood for </span></span></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">The Notebook</span></span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> or </span></span></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Pretty Woman</span></span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> . I am not opposed to them; I watch them when I have a girlfriend. It is purely situational. Actually I usually find something I like about them.</span></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">"He has the power to hear everything women are thinking. Finally... a man is listening." - IMDB.com </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I began to ponder on this ridiculous idea and wondered if things would be better or worse if this was in any way a realistic achievement. If suddenly men listened and understood women, would it not throw off the balance of relationships everywhere? Wouldn't it be like removing insects and throwing the entire ecosystem into a tailspin? Maybe it would also be like removing politicians from government. In all of these scenarios I predict complete chaos.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">So let us think for a minute about the other side of the coin. Maybe this would be a good thing and 'efficiency' would become common in relationships. Maybe the next time a group of guys gathered over cards and beer they would say things like, "Well, she isn't the most attractive woman I have been with, but we have an efficient relationship." And possibly an adequate response would be, "Damn, I wish Kim and I could be like that. It takes forever to get anything done when we are together."</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Isn't the best part of meeting someone getting to know him or her? If you heard every thought they had, would you still ask questions or even be interested at all? I would find it interesting at first then I would be bored to tears as if watching the weather channel on repeat. In the movie, Mel's character doesn't have the power to use the "gift' when he wants to or not. If I had no control, I would lose my mind. I would be constantly infiltrated by the thoughts of those around me. It would force me to be a recluse.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I think the 'gift' actually exists in all of us and is earned by taking the time to listen to those close to you. If you connect with someone mentally then you have the ability to connect with them on any emotional, spiritual and sexual level.</span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">The stereotype that men don’t understand women and that they are detached emotionally, is just that - a general and vague assessment of men as a whole. No matter what kind of man you are, you have the ability to understand women if you choose to. You do not have to be a mind reader to know what she is thinking or feeling. Watch, listen and learn - and you too can know what women want. </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, serif;color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:14.0pt;mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#999900;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#999900;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#999900;"> </span></span></span><o:p></o:p></p> <!--EndFragment-->trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-14210011079171603742010-04-03T09:19:00.001-07:002010-04-03T17:45:49.780-07:00The Reclining of Civilization<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 14px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;"><br /></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;">This is a journey of one man's probe into the death of traditional dating and the erection of the new and improved Internet dating scene.<br /><br /><br />How it all started:<br /><br />John: are you going to movie night tomorrow?<br /><br />Me: I am taking tomorrow off...a dinner tonight then movie, bed and sleeping in!<br /><br />John: nice! dinner date? sorry, I forgot her name?<br /><br />Me: no, my old group of friends from kickboxing gym.<br /><br />John: yeah I know how that goes. i'm really enjoying the freedom of being single.. and by freedom I mean just chilling and doing whatever.<br /><br />Me: yeah...I gotcha...I have done that for the last 4 yrs...I wouldn't mind some female companionship.<br /><br />John: the last 3 serious relationships i've had were on there I just wasn't ready for them. lol.<br /><br />Me: really? I have never done that...kinda freaks me out.<br /><br />John: yeah man. its actually really good. just be honest in the text part. and let someone else choose your photos. how do you think I met Sara, Emily and Denise? except Emily and me never dated. actually met almost a dozen girls off there. and this time of year is the best time to join. lots of hot girls for some reason.<br /><br />Me: hmm...maybe I could approach it as an experiment...and write about it...the only way I might be able to respect myself.<br /><br />John: ha ha ha ok whatever makes you feel better. get a girlfriend to pick your photos though and don't expect much out of the first 3 weeks. but you have to be active on there.. make the first move and stuff.<br /><br />Me: ugh...seriously, freaks me out...what if someone I know sees it!?<br /><br />John: no biggie. you can call them out cause they have to have a membership to see you too!<br /><br />Me: sounds like so much work...<br /><br />John: dating is man. its fun though. I consider it shopping, not dating. ha ha.<br /><br />Me: it kinda is. I see it that way too...not sure women see it so black n white.<br /><br />John: worked for me, I actually got a few friends with benefits from it too.<br /><br />Me: hmm. oh, another thing...how much does this cost a month?<br /><br />John: it depends on how long you choose. I usually do the 3 months, its like 19.95 each month.<br /><br />Me: ok, after new years...I will try Match if you come over one night and help me out. maybe invite Kerry or Allison over too, for the female perspective. I am not good at selling myself...or writing about myself.<br /><br />John: yeah we can definitely do that. Kerry would LOVE to help. lol.<br /><br />Me: ha...I will ask her when she gets back from the holidays.<br /><br />John: have plenty of photos ready.<br /><br />Me: already plenty on facebook, ready to go.<br /><br />John: k<br /><br />So then I contacted Allison:<br /><br />Me: favor. so john convinced me to do the Match thing....you know how I feel about this...so I want to do it for writing purposes. so I need help. you and john as advisors...to set up whatever it is.<br /><br />Allison: what?? you are going on Match?<br /><br />Me: well, I was considering doing it...but I would need a male and female perspective.<br /><br />Allison: sorry you! haha, ok. I can help. you know who else is on it...Zeke.<br /><br />Me: I cannot sell myself.... and you know how uncomfortable the idea makes me feel.<br /><br />Allison: I know I know, and it’s all about the profile blurb (from a girls perspective)<br /><br />Me: I hate that people will know and did you talk him into it? see, I need your help. well, john said he would help too so lemme know when you might have time and we can meet up at my place and have a drink and get it launched.<br /><br />Allison: LOL! you are too funny. "launch" like we are doing a whole website or somethin...<br /><br />Me: it is a social experiment for me to write on. take someone that said never and do it...and go for it.<br /><br /></span></span></span></span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;">Allison: ok, that sounds good...I will make a suggestion for now though...write down some of your passions/hobbies/interests</span></span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;"><wbr></span></span></span><span class="word_break" style="display: block; float: left; margin-left: -10px; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; "></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;"> that you'd want someone to know about you and write down 5 things you want from a girl...and 5 things you think you have to offer...and write down one little paragraph blurb that counts as your "background" i.e., you grew up in xyz, moved to xyz, went to xyz school, etc.<br /><br />Me: great, nothing to offer. no real career. no money. just an average dude. ugh..hate this already!!!!<br /><br />Allison: TREY<br /><br />Me: I feel like my mom just yelled at me!<br /><br />Allison: I mean...you are funny, a deep thinker, trustworthy to the bone, a great communicator.... those are things I mean by what you OFFER in terms of the RELATIONSHIP...and I did just yell at you : )<br /><br />Me: I need to vomit.<br /><br />Allison: What!!! you are crackin me up!<br /><br />Me: really...I am going to write a classified ad...for sale...awkward way to meet a man...<br /><br />Allison: how is it that someone is such an introspective, thoughtful, insightful person...and can’t write a little one-pager on themselves?<br /><br />Me: why can I not get work? I can't sell myself. I need a photo rep. and a cave.<br /><br />Allison: well you COULD approach your whole profile from a very funny unique and creative way...not really talk about yourself...or talk about yourself but be totally fictional in an obvious but funny way. I have read those before.<br /><br />Me: might be easier...I will get drunk by myself, watch a chick flick, eat a gallon of ice cream and attempt to write something on poster board in bubble letters.<br /><br />Allison: hahahahahahaha. ooh goodness! did u ever do one of those 25 random things about me blogs on FB? you could potentially just post pictures, and then say refer to your FB page for more info?<br /><br />Me: I think I have my start to my article...social Internet anxiety yes...was my 1st FB piece.<br /><br />Allison: well use your 25 things then!<br /><br />Me: oh...that would save me...if anyone cared they can get to know anything about me there...and there is a lot there. in every section I will post my FB link!<br /><br />Allison: LOL! I am not sure you can do an actual link, but you can point them that direction in a way that Match won't remove. and you don’t HAVE to fill out every section. I skipped a lot, bc my profile got too long, no guy is gonna read that much. ok, running to lunch.<br /><br />Me: k. let's meet next week for the 'launch'!<br /><br />Ok, let's pause here. Since you might be thinking, "Oh how boring and unoriginal. Another boy makes bet with boy, boy meets girl, girl learns truth, girl dumps boy, boy tries to win girl back story."<br /><br />Well, your guess is as good as mine since this is a true story being written as it happens.<br /><br />John, Allison and I decided to meet the next week. So I tried to sit down and do the homework Allison assigned me. First of all, it is not easily explained what I want in a woman. It is much easier to express what I do not want, which is mostly what I have had. However, I finally narrowed it down. Next I tried to write the five things I have to offer and this was much more difficult. Besides creative I could only think of the same five things I want in a woman. I guess I want a much more attractive female version of me. I decided to wait on input from my Match advisors. For a writer it is always a painful experience trying to sell myself. This is one of the many reasons I don't think a social dating site is normal. All this initial info I put out there but one of the best things about meeting people is getting to know them. I think we are just as likely to overlook someone who offers their life on paper as much as by chance not meeting them.<br /><br />This is all I could come up with on my first attempt without help.<br /><br />Five things I want in a woman:<br /><br />open-minded, physically active, witty, easy-going, good communication skills<br /><br />Five things I think I have to offer a woman:<br /><br />creative, (who am I!?)<br /><br />My background:<br /><br />I grew up in Louisiana, went to college for five years leaving with two BFA's and moved to Nashville and have been here since.<br /><br />I emailed Allison my progress.<br /><br />Allison: Well that's a great start! you know, it's not considered bragging to write down a little about how you see yourself in the relationship. What would an ex-gf say about you? How you make her feel xyz or that you were really good about doing/expressing xyz. She loved when you did? Or that you were so xyz. Describe your personality or describe your relationship skills. You can also add some dislikes to your girl list-pet peeves.<br /><br />Me: yeah, like a playboy centerfold, 'I don't like mean people', etc<br /><br />So the next step was to figure out how to describe myself. I emailed about ten women friends and asked them how they would describe me to another woman. Since the way you perceive yourself is different from others I emailed close friends as well as new ones. I received a lot of responses. Some made me laugh and others perplexed me. It is interesting how different people see you through their eyes. Obviously, I could not use all of them and would not want to use most of them.<br /><br />The good, the bad and the ugly:<br /><br />a man of many talents<br /><br />a man that longs to be loved and in love, but refuses to let love in<br /><br />a real friend<br /><br />always on the go<br /><br />artistic<br /><br />can be an old man sometimes<br /><br />caring<br /><br />cerebral<br /><br />commitment phobe<br /><br />creative<br /><br />cute<br /><br />different enough not to be weird<br /><br />easily adaptable in situations<br /><br />easy to talk to<br /><br />encouraging<br /><br />experienced turmoil but overcome it<br /><br />fears rejection and failure<br /><br />fun<br /><br />funny that comes out when you least expect it<br /><br />genuine<br /><br />good body<br /><br />good listener<br /><br />good looking<br /><br />good sense of humor<br /><br />good taste in music<br /><br />great conversationalist<br /><br />great grasp on relationships<br /><br />great insight into the human spirit<br /><br />hard-won character<br /><br />has savior complex<br /><br />has slept with a lot of women<br /><br />has unworthy complex<br /><br />helpful with others<br /><br />honest<br /><br />instinctive<br /><br />intelligent<br /><br />Jewish<br /><br />kind<br /><br />knows everybody<br /><br />loving<br /><br />man of many words<br /><br />man that has a caring heart<br /><br />man that sees into the detail of things and situations<br /><br />moody<br /><br />not afraid of a beer and a party<br /><br />on the rocker side<br /><br />overall stellar man<br /><br />pleasant to talk to<br /><br />quick to smile<br /><br />scared to be happy<br /><br />Scared to not be needed<br /><br />scared to succeed<br /><br />seasoned in experience but young at heart<br /><br />sentimental<br /><br />shies away compliments<br /><br />slightly anal<br /><br />smart<br /><br />somewhat cynical<br /><br />somewhat spontaneous and can sometimes do the unexpected<br /><br />straight shooter<br /><br />supportive<br /><br />tells stories so funny I could pee myself<br /><br />thoughtful<br /><br />thoughtfully selects words<br /><br />too frightened to open up<br /><br />understanding<br /><br />very accommodating<br /><br />very cool guy<br /><br />witty<br /><br /><br /><br />I emailed John and Allison a few of the bad and funny ones.<br /><br />John: Those are all over the place!<br /><br />Allison: THAT is hilarious! I don't think you should include "has slept with a lot of women" LOL! May be a little too honest there. "slightly anal" hahaha, goodness. I'm guessing you pissed off some of these women?<br /><br />Me: Ha, nah. I'm not going to use these but I thought there were funny ones!<br /><br />I blame my fear of resumes and forms on being creative. I was always terrible at standardized tests in school. I am better with the formats of an IQ test, and I get higher scores too. So when it comes to creating a profile it seems so flat.<br /><br />I am much better in person; you don't know me unless you hang out with me. Reading my writing or seeing my photography might give a glimpse but I have many sides. I am boring and seem lame on paper. I have to choose photos of myself for this too. I am not good with being photographed. There is a reason I am on the other side of the lens and at home writing alone. I look bad in photos so I always try to look goofy and silly while having fun. I just can't take myself seriously in photos.<br /><br />I will need to find a creative way to express myself in the confining formats of online dating information. The more I learn about this the more work and effort it seems one must put into this. There must certainly be an art and formula to this but so far it seems forced and manipulated.<br /><br />Due to conflicting schedules Allison, John and I were unable to meet this week so we tried to progress the process via email. I asked Allison to suggest some of my photos off my Facebook page. She did so and I asked why she chose these particular images. In her response she gave valid and understandable reasons for her choices.<br /><br />Allison: well I like the one where you are half naked, for obvious reasons. hey, we all wanna get an idea of the goods.<br /><br />you are outdoorsy - so include some of where you are doing those activities, with friends<br /><br />I like the kickball one too - shows you 1) have friends 2) do activities<br /><br />the rest are good face shots I think. I don’t like when someone posts just shots where the smile is the same in every one. its good to see all the angles to get a real idea of what they look like. plus you look like your goofy/fun and you are. I'd also include some of your cool photography work! since you'll probably say something about that in the body of your profile.<br /><br />Me: Ok...sooo many photos but I get the idea. when I pick them I will send to you to ok! thanks for your help!<br /><br />So I set out to find images of myself that met the criteria. Thanks to the digital age I have more images of family, friends and myself than I have time to go through. I have dedicated tonight to find the perfect shots to fill the bill. As a photographer I know how difficult it is to choose images of yourself to put out there for other people to judge you by before they even meet you. I will be emailing my choices to be approved by Allison. Wish me luck.<br /><br />I narrowed my choices down to fifteen photos keeping in mind the criteria Allison set up for me. In the meantime John has been sending me other online dating links. When a service is free I call it questionable. I think paying eliminates the less truthful and serious contenders. Also, how many of these can one join and maintain without spending too much time and effort. I mean, it is starting to sound like some guys who can't regulate the use of their home video games.<br /><br />I am a skeptic. I don't believe in ghosts or miracles. I have never personally seen evidence to prove that ghosts exist and I have been to haunted houses with both still and video cameras. By definition a miracle is something that cannot be explained scientifically. So I am challenging Match to prove its hype.<br /><br />Ok, I did it. I tried to log on to Match.com to browse and I feel like I got railroaded into joining. It all happened so fast. I committed to three months, which was $60. I am now a reluctant member. The actual process was fast and easy especially since I was prepared with photos, a description of me and what I was looking for.<br /><br />Now I was ready to jump into the pool of potentials, but I had problems finding the diving board. I finally found a ladder, which was not nearly as exciting. I was very honest when filling in my search criteria and the sad results were that only six women matched and none of them I found attractive in the least. I tweaked my search information for over an hour and finally out of about eighty-five results I saw one woman that I found both attractive and interesting. Only one.<br /><br />I was frustrated that being honest I found nothing out there. I was even more frustrated that I had to allow what I really wanted to be morphed into what seemed like a desperate and lonely old man grasping for straws while choking on his heart medication staring at a nearly empty glass of water.<br /><br />After expressing my frustration to John he assumed that you have to give it more than a month and to lower my expectations and to stretch my horizons. By that he meant lower the age in searching. I reduced the age by one year and suddenly over eight hundred women met my loose criteria. So then I stripped away the fat and still wound up with only about seventy-five potentials. Unfortunately, I still only found about five who were mildly attractive or interesting to me.<br /><br />I broke down and emailed the original one who caught my eye. Much to my surprise she returned my email the next day. She seemed to have a good sense of humor, which is always high on my lists of must haves. Since then we have hardly communicated. I find it hard to keep conversation with someone that you don't know. I quickly exhausted the few things we had in common.<br /><br />Then there are the 'winks' and other simple features that I just don't get similar to the 'pokes' on social networking sites. Really, is this what dating has come to a series of winks, pokes, nudges, etc!? I felt like a boy again on the playground at recess watching another boy pull a girl's hair, insult her and run away as she is left crying. Ah, the beginning of the wild and unexplained flirting behavior. Is it me or am I discovering that my instincts to reject this method of dating are being quickly founded with overwhelming evidence?<br /><br />Then there is online dating etiquette. What do you do when a woman contacts you and you have no interest in them? No one wants to be rejected, even if it is easier to do via technology. Is there an automated reply like you can set up on your work email? "I would like to thank you for your interest. However, due to the heavy amount of email traffic a response will be delayed." or "Thank you very much for contacting me but I have no interest in pursuing this opportunity." Seriously, what do you say? So you choose to say nothing.<br /><br />Then there is the scam. I received my first questionable email yesterday. A limited profile was set up with a message stating that she was not a member but to text her if I was interested. I emailed Karl since I recently found out he was on Match to get his advice. That afternoon as I read his response I logged in to see the questionable email again. Ha, I was right! It must have been a scam. The profile no longer existed.<br /><br />Now a week later, not much has changed. I am getting interest from women around my age but honestly I do not look, act or have the same interests as most women my age. I am single with no kids and very active physically and socially. Most women my age are nothing like me. I have different goals and interests as a whole. Maybe I should lie about my age. It is only a number right? So often people are surprised at my age, in a good way. I want to find cool, fun, active women to share my interests and life with. I am not into settling down and giving up on life. I don't think you have to change for someone else, you find someone more like you.<br /><br />Two weeks in and I have decided Match serves a personals version of Monster.com or CareerBuilder.com and the like. It is like an online resume for you. You upload your 'resume' and the potential 'employers' peruse at their leisure. You might get a bite or two but to land an interview in a flailing 'job' market is harder than it sounds.<br /><br />Week three and I am not optimistic. Auto daily matches and manual searches seem to find maybe one a week I might find interesting. I am in no rush to get old, fat and boring. My age seems to attract women that should be in my age bracket but few women my age are of my mindset and lifestyle. I feel like most people have a plan and follow it. Women that I can relate to are a little younger. They are usually more carefree and less rigid in their game plan of life. Why do people work so hard to save to live life by their own rules when they are too old to really live by then? I feel like I am shopping for carpet but all the showroom will show me are small 4"x4" samples. I am much better in person. How can you display your sample of yourself in a manner that is really a fair representation of the whole you? Then again, why would you? One of the best parts of a relationship is getting to know the person. It reminds me of graduating from college and having a hard time landing a job when you don't have experience. That damn Catch 22!<br /><br />I am five weeks in now and have made little progress. I have been wondering what to do if someone contacts you that you are not interested in. So far I have just not responded. However I recently received a no thank you return email from someone that I had emailed that I was interested in. I read an automatic response as if it was from a business contact I had emailed and they were out of the office. Also, I have been slightly tweaking my profile. They offer tips for this as well as for a first email to someone. Most of their tips seem like common sense to me though. I have briefly conversed with a few women but it seems hard to keep much going. There is one that has been responsive. So far it has been easy small talk but it is more than I have been reciprocated with thus far.<br /><br />After speaking with women friends who are also on Match, I realize not to put too much stock in doling out winks. If they are attractive most women are bombarded with winks and emails since they are being pursued. I think an email is more personal so I have been working in that approach more. It is more proactive.<br /><br />One friend went as far as to challenge me to ask out two women per week. She emphasized not necessarily ones that I think are "perfect" for me rather ones that meet my basics. Well, that makes a point I have been trying to make, that this is a flawed approach. I know how different attraction levels can be in person. I still feel that I would rather meet a woman in person and know right then if there is a connection or not. It makes a first date less awkward if your first impression is in person rather than building a persona through the Internet.<br /><br />So people really do this? I feel like Match is just a series of redundant clicks.<br /><br />I have lost interest and have received no interest after more than six weeks. So I slightly exaggerate but on a scale of 1 to 10 my success and enjoyment with this is a 3. Initially it was interesting but now it seems more like a chore and a waste of time. I think even in this format most people still simply judge a book by its cover. I have sent over 35 emails and winked at least 45 times and I have had very little response. So far I have concluded that there are too few women on Match that are even close to being compatible with me. Surely I am not an odd case. There are too few women who interest me and the ones that may I must not interest them. I just think it is a face value, shallow and disconnected way to meet someone. There is nothing that can come close to the experience of meeting someone for the first time. No matter if there are sparks or not nothing can replace face-to-face human interaction.<br /><br />Seemingly at my wits end I made a decision. I was thinking, 'screw them'. Either people get me or they don't. Then I thought something wasn't working so I should alter my profile. Wait, am I trying to sell myself? Is this a game? Maybe I would find an article online called, "How to be successful on Match.com" No, I did not look for it because it probably exists. Next I was thinking how confining they have this display of you set up. I hate being defined by x numbers of words here, quote here, photos here. How can a creative person express himself or herself like this!? So I deleted 3 photos and dropped a lot of text they said I should use. I also had another plan. I am a writer so I dropped my last piece called Love Is... into my profile. Now let's see if I get any bites. I feel like I am fishing in uncharted waters and I am using every bait in my box till I hook me a record sized bass. Time will tell. I am persistent<br /><br />An </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; line-height: normal; white-space: pre-wrap; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;">excerpt</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;"> from Love Is:<br /><br />'I wonder about her demeanor after a long day at work, the expression that lights her face in a moment of joy, the color of her aura during a passionate kiss. I imagine the feelings of doing my laundry and finding one of her hairs entangled in a shirt as if clinging onto me while she is not in my presence. I daydream of rolling over and smelling her on my pillow case and knowing she was previously lying right beside me. I try to picture watching a movie together. Does she like to cuddle if the movie is sad or scary? Does she leave her underwear and toothbrush out? Would she enjoy drinking wine and conversing as I prepared a homemade meal for her?'<br /><br />Well that profile makeover made a huge difference. I immediately had more response even yielding my first to VIP emails and response from a Top 5 Daily pick. I have had primarily female readership on my blog and on Facebook so it makes sense that my writing elicited more response on Match. However, I now have new dilemmas. I have been receiving three times the interest that I was before.<br /><br />If you are as clueless about the VIP emails as I was here is how Match describes them:<br /><br />Don't miss the chance to let your email stand out from all the rest.<br />What makes your VIP Emails special?<br />• Only one can be sent per week, so anyone who gets one is sure to know you're a Very Interested Person.<br />• They stay at the top of the Inbox for 7 days, or until responded to, so they're never overlooked.<br />• You can see when these emails have been read.<br /><br />I recently received two VIP emails on Match, two interested, and two winks. In your Daily 5 you answer yes, no or maybe. Evidently when you choose yes it notifies that person. Yet, of all the recent attention only one truly stood out to me. So, I emailed Baily and we began dialogue.<br /><br />The first flag is that she has a kid. Ok, not necessarily a red flag but one that would not been overlooked before. I am trying to be more open-minded. She has shared custody so she has some time to herself or to share with someone else. I am trying to get to know women for just them and not run because they have additions that come with them. Although I hate drama and stress. Maybe it is because I am an only child, or that I have only had to consider me most of my life or that I have never dated anyone with a child or that I have rarely been around kids at all most of my life except for when I was one myself. I do know I would rather be with someone and enjoy that before kids were ever part of the plan. But I am almost forty and I just don't think of having kids as I would be sixty or older when they graduated from high school. On the other hand I worry about them already having a kid or kids and the lifelong issue you would have with the ex and learning to love and deal with kids that are not yours. All of this is so foreign to me. I am sure you can tell but I will state it for all to hear, kids scare me.<br /><br />Secondly, she lives in a town thirty minutes away. Again, I have not even considered this before. I do know how difficult it can be to make time when distance is an issue. I live in the city, I mean really in the city so the thought of spending time in a small suburb town is again scary to me. Small town life seems so stagnant. Everything from the mentality to the options is different. Damn, I guess I am a snob. That is depressing.<br /><br />So after several emails on Match we moved to gmail and then to chatting. She hinted at meeting up soon so I sent her the email below.<br /><br />'Well, to answer your question yesterday...I do not have time to date much but I think if you and another dig each other you make time. Also, I do actually meet a lot of women but between being so picky and timing, it is usually an 'I’ll pass' situation. I guess Match takes the timing out of it. I have only been on for six weeks and I have not gone out with anyone I have met yet. So back to me being picky...my friends tell me I am a snob but I choose to say more picky and wise. Plus, I do not see the point in wasting your time or theirs if it is not right. Even if you are just having fun, hanging out is cool so long as you are on the same page. So, yes we need to actually get together. I am apprehensive though. I have never met anyone online. I am used to meeting someone first in person. It is easier to tell right away if you are attracted to them and if there is chemistry or a connection. Anyway...so you come in town a few times a week? When will you be in next? I am busy but hopefully we can coordinate a time soon.'<br /><br />She said she was making out her schedule for her time with her daughter and tossed out a few dates and we settled on next Wednesday since both of our weekends were packed this weekend and next. I told her I would take her to a dive bar near my place. Dive bars are very trendy now days but this is a real dive bar. They have a jukebox, one pool table, one booth, four tables and a bar. The majority of people who go in there are regulars and most are thirty-five to sixty years old. They do make a great yet simple made fresh burger. Also, the beer is cheap and it is quiet enough to hear each other for a first date discussion. Now I just have to not think about what I am doing and run every scenario through my head before I even meet this woman. Good luck to me.<br /><br />The night before our date I saw a missed call from Bailey. I was surprised since we had not spoken on the phone yet. When I listened to the phone message I heard she wanted to speak to me before our date. My mind began racing. She said 'before our date' so she is not canceling. What could it be? It is not her in the photos, although they did not give much information anyway. She has a boyfriend that she already met through Match and she doesn't feel right going out with someone else. Nope, I was wrong on all counts, she just wanted to chat. Bad timing can be more painful than direct rejection because rejection is definitive and with bad timing you might never know. So far if there is one positive, it is the way Match is that it eliminates the factor of bad timing. People are on dating sites to meet someone special therefore a mission is stated. Possibly another positive to a dating site is that there is rejection with anonymity. You don't have to respond and neither do they. No harm, no foul.<br /><br />First date and done. First of all, her one photo of herself was years old and before she had her child. I have an older photo on my profile too but I don't look much different. Her personality was larger than via email. She was funny and made some very animated faces. She was laid back and able to just roll with things. I really dug her and we had a good time. However, I just did not feel it. There was something missing. It felt like she was more into me than I was her. I have been there and I didn't like that feeling and I did not want someone else to feel the same way. Maybe I am just not ready for a serious relationship like I had thought I was. I told her that I don't want to waste people's time or lead them on. I am no BS when it comes to many things, especially these matters. She was disappointed and honestly so was I. I had to tell her that I thought it would be best to not pursue the situation. The sense of relief was equal to the feeling of disappointment.<br /><br />So, was my first date a success? I think I met a very cool woman but not in a romantic fashion. She deserves to be with someone that can and will give her what she needs. I am sure it could work at least for a while but why would I stand in the way of another person's happiness? How dare anyone take that away from anyone else!? She was very understanding and appreciated my honesty. I think I have made an amazing new friend.<br /><br />As my three month period on Match.com is coming to a close I have finally met someone very special. However, I did not met her on Match but through natural selection in the real world. Even this wonderful match comes with imperfections. At my age and this point in my life, I think we all carry a little baggage. It is the past that defines who we are. Adversity builds character. This experience has taught me that the smallest things make the biggest difference. When you are open to possibilities anything is possible. No amount of checked boxes or self descriptions can match that initial personal connection. You can't replace chemistry with any amount of formulas or gimmicks. The first spark is the purest. There is no faking or mistaking chemistry. You can't compartmentalize or contain love. If we meet fate half way miracles can happen. It really does happen when you least expect it.<br /><br /></span></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFCC33;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></span></b></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-24982538460879127132010-03-11T15:36:00.000-08:002010-03-11T15:38:54.502-08:00The Next Big Thing<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><br /></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I told her I had always lived alone</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And I probably always would</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And all I wanted was my freedom</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And she told me that she understood</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">But I let her do some of my laundry</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And she slipped a few meals in between</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And the next thing I remember, she was all moved in</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And I was buying her a washing machine</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><br /></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Ready or Not</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Jackson Browne</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I have decided next time I share my living space with a woman I am romantically involved with it will be for the right reasons. It will be a huge step to ask her to do so. In the past it has always just sort of happened.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Maybe it has been out of convenience. I love being around women; it is comforting. I know it has happened for financial reasons. We were always together anyway. Why pay rent in two places? Sometimes they just accumulate things at your place and then have no need to go home. For whatever the reasons in the past, it will not happen again. Next time I will not just wake up one day to a live in relationship.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Some of you may think this is immoral but before I even think of anything that serious again I want to test the waters before I dive in. I have no problem with a roommate for financial reasons so that moving in together is not an easy option. Moral and religious opinions aside, maybe waiting until marriage to live together gives you both more incentive to work harder. Possibly the fear of failure due to the binding commitment of marriage changes your perspective. Although I am not opposed to marriage, I do not think it is in any way a necessity. If my commitment is not good enough without a legal document then it never will be. But hey, different strokes.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">So the next big thing I could do personally would be to get down on one knee and ask to live together. It must be because I love spending time with her so much that I want her to know me even better. I want her to be a part of my everyday life. Also, women can add warmth to your home with little details that don't overwhelm or scare you. If done correctly, you will discover many things you don't need but suddenly don't want to be without. If she wants to take over and get rid of all that represents you and replace with everything that represents her...red flag, abort mission!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I have a big heart under all of the accumulated protective armor. I have gone beyond my capabilities physically, emotionally and financially to help others and I have often received little or nothing in return. I know now from experience that you can't fix or help or rescue some people. When other people's problems become yours, then it is an issue. We all have issues, but we need to own them. So don't ever move in together for any other reason than love.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Some may argue that the quickest way to kill a relationship is to move in together. However, that being said, I think most often that things are going to work out or not. So maybe it is a way to find out more quickly instead of drawing out relationships for years and then realizing you are so incompatible that you can not even live together.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">In the end, there are no guarantees. Dating is a process. It is a combination of elimination and previous experience. Hopefully, we learn from our mistakes as well as those of others. As well, we seem to know more of what we don't want from having experienced it. So, we try until we no longer need to. Why would you continue to look for your car keys when you have already found them. I love it when people say, "They were in the last place I looked!"</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">If you have any doubts at all, do not move in together. It is not healthy to go into something like this thinking it might not work out. It is much easier to end a relationship when you do not live together. So, in the unfortunate case it doesn't work out, be prepared. It is similar to a divorce and it is neither fun nor easy.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I am neither endorsing nor condoning moving in together. I am just pointing out pros and cons. We all know we rarely listen to others do want most of the time anyway. No matter what, be aware and don't make such a big decision lightly. Whatever you decide, do it with conviction and maybe this time will be the last.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b><b></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p> </p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-39189746960762616422010-03-09T12:51:00.001-08:002010-03-09T12:53:20.943-08:00Dig<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 14px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#663366;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The mist was thick, fog-like. It blew in gusts under the street-lamp like sheets rippling on a clothesline on a blistering summer day. But this was winter, bitter and frozen. Alan stepped out on the stoop for a smoke to settle his nerves. He never smoked in the house. As long as he smoked he never liked the smell of it. His clothes, house, car and even his pet were sheltered from being tainted by his part-time addiction. As he stared at his glistening feet wet with mist, he wondered what it would be like to live somewhere far away from his troubles. He mentally went back through the time line of his life to figure out where it all went wrong. Mitch knew he could not change the past but he no longer wanted to live with the shadow of it. If there was one thing he had learned it was to not put off the now until later. It was a quick easy trip into the hole but it was taking much longer to dig out. He wondered if he was flooding the dam or damning the flood.</span></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-14526730118054695282010-02-19T12:38:00.001-08:002010-03-09T12:52:27.071-08:00For sale<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 0px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 0px; font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" font-weight: normal; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We always hear of people selling their souls. It seems so definite and dramatic but we often sell many other things for even less. Don't fool yourself. We are all selling and we are all buying. We are human currency. We all sell our outer appearance, sexuality, career, intelligence, sense of humor, wealth, etc and we all have a price. Even selling nothing is selling something.</span></span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Comedians sell their humor, musicians sell their music, filmmakers sell their vision, models sell their looks, and athletes sell their ability, and so on. Even we 'normal folk' all sell something.<br /></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Of course, we all know that prostitution is referred to as the oldest profession. It goes back to the beginning of time. Women who were not married or were widowed often had no way to earn a living. They were often not allowed to own property or learn a trade. Since men had always been at the mercy of their urges, women learned they could sell their bodies to get things they needed such as food, shelter and clothing.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I think we all have the 'buy up' plan in mind and everything we do is to attract a mate. You may disagree but indirectly this is true. Men strive for success, looks, money, fame, etc all to attract a mate. A guy may need to express himself as a musician but in doing so it attracts women. Again, some might argue that not every singer only made that decision to get women but it is an indirect result. An accountant or actuary may not pursue that career in the intention of making a ton of money to get women but it attracts women. Financial stability is high on the attraction scale. The trend of establishing self sufficiency before settling down demonstrates the </span><em><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">want</span></em><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> instead of a </span><em><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">need</span></em><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> for a man. Why do women try so hard to hold onto their looks for so long? Because they know men place physical attraction high on the list. When we feel secure in our lives and establish self-worth we then use that to attract a mate. </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We can't all be 'top shelf' but the combinations of these attributes can land you a good deal. Often looks, money, status, intelligence, success or humor can be interchangeable. This is why you often see wealthy older men with younger attractive women or a comedian with an actress or an actor with a model. Yet not all combinations work. Have you ever heard of a male super model comedian? I did not think so.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">In writing this I had to ask myself what it is that I am selling. It is much easier to look at my friends and be able to determine what they are selling. But after self-analyzing I realized that I sell different things to different people in different situations. In business I sell my knowledge and experience. With family I sell unconditional love. With friends I sell loyalty. I guess potential mates get a mixture of all of the above. How I sell myself to women is one of the most difficult to nail down.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">So what are you selling and are you selling the right thing? Is there enough demand for what you are selling? How does what you are selling differ from the other sellers around you? I guess in the end it is not how or what you are selling but rather that you sell it with conviction. Like a salesperson, it is easier and more enjoyable to sell that which you believe in one hundred percent. With dedication and perseverance your big payday will come when your ship sails in. After all, don't good things come to those who wait? Well, maybe more so to those who actively seek it out. The search for that great bargain is usually worth it.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p><p> </p></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-72958064642215358372010-02-12T12:11:00.001-08:002010-04-03T09:20:32.298-07:00Love Is...<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 0px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 0px; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 14px; "><i style=" ;font-family:'lucida sans', 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">You're sweet like I can't deny<br />You say it to me and you only use your eyes<br />So come here don't move<br />I've got a lot heart growing heavier for you<br /><br />The sparks in your touch<br />I'm playing with fire<br />You're never too much that I am entirely in<br />Love is the worst you can't explain<br />But once you feel it inside you're not the same<br />I climbed so high that I can't find the air<br /><br /></span></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Steve Moakler</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br />True Like Your Name</span></span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /><br /><br />Do you remember where you were when the moment last struck you? That splinter of time when clarity and confusion blur into one. Calmness is jolted by loss of breath and vision loses depth. The back of the neck forces fear from every pore and a ripple runs through the exterior causing every hair to dance. Nausea explodes from the gut to the brain and back again. The entire body is shuddered at every beat until muteness agitates the ears. Acceptance scares fear then smothers agitation with assurance.<br /><br />In the beginning, even before it starts there is a flash of too many emotions that cause anarchy in the brain. It might be the first time you ever speak to her or the monumental first ‘I love you’ when it seems like eternity waiting for a response. Anxiety releases adrenaline into the blood stream and sometimes those are the sweetest fractions of time.<br /><br />I wonder about her demeanor after a long day at work, the expression that lights her face in a moment of joy, the color of her aura during a passionate kiss. I imagine the feelings of doing my laundry and finding one of her hairs entangled in a shirt as if clinging onto me while she is not in my presence. I daydream of rolling over and smelling her on my pillow case and knowing she was previously lying right beside me. I try to picture watching a movie together. Does she like to cuddle if the movie is sad or scary? Does she leave her underwear and toothbrush out? Would she enjoy drinking wine and conversing as I prepared a homemade meal for her?<br /><br />Being true to my Gemini nature I question whether I believe in love anymore. After all, what is love? Is your definition of it the same as others'? Can you see it or hold it? Do we not consider love the physical or emotional act? Is it similar to a record where you own a physical container of music but never actually hold the songs? Is love not faith, trust and emotions? But to me that seems only our own physical interpretation of what we think love is.<br /><br />Webster's defines it, movies portray it and songs cry out for it. So much time, money and effort devoted to love seems to be a manifestation of desire yet it still remains intangible. There exists an overabundance of dedicated and faithful followers for something we can never truly have. Is love something you can't live without or is it worth fighting or dying for?<br /><br />Is love comparable to the human body's need of water and air or is it an unnecessary luxury such as a chocolate truffle? So while I dream about relationship bliss and the woman to share that with, I have to ask myself if what society is selling is a want or a need. No matter what, our individual definition of love must be defined before we truly understand what it is that we are yearning for. Whether real or mythical, supply tells us that there is enough for everyone if we demand that we find it.<br /><br /><br /></span></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FFFF33;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">by Trey Mitchell</span></span></span></b></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-38255275612732559552010-02-10T13:00:00.001-08:002010-02-12T12:12:36.371-08:00Just Press Play<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Have you ever heard a song and thought 'I should have written that!'? Songs which express exactly what you are feeling at the time can often be therapy. Songs can narrate the moments of the comedy, drama or tragedy in our lives. Some of my favorite songs remind me of the best and worst times of my life and paint a perfect picture. There is a song for every occasion and mood. Below are some songs that narrate parts of my life.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Bittersweet - Big Head Todd & the Monsters</span></span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">She says, "I just might leave tomorrow."<br />He says, "Tomorrow never comes."<br />So we'll just learn to love our sorrow.<br />I'll love you tender as you're sleeping.<br />I'll love you bitter through the day.</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">My last girlfriend in college and I broke up just before I graduated. Like most relationships it had started out as a new and exciting experience. The longer it lasted the more things took a turn for the worse. Because of our age and the place we were both at we had to make a decision to move forward or let it go. She was leaving for a new job in another state and I had no idea where I was moving to. I had gone as far as to visit the city with her to investigate job opportunities. Unfortunately, my attraction to her was waning and she noticed. At one time she made a comment about being happier with someone else and she did not like my response. I told her that if she wanted to be with someone else it was ok, but that meant we were done. I am not one to try to convince someone to be with me if they don't want to. Of course, the relationship dissolved. We wanted different things at the time and our contrasting backgrounds influenced us heavily. She came from a family of macho country men that did not share their emotions because they saw it as weakness. I did not want to settle and wonder if there was more out there for me. Sleep may be your best escape from a declining relationship but whatever problems exist will still confront you when you wake. I told her what she saw as a weakness in me someone else would see as strength. It was a mutual break up and we both knew it was the best thing for both of us. We remained friends and she is now married with a kid. A college buddy and I went to visit her the weekend before her wedding. The guy she was marrying was perfect for her. I always want the best for women I have dated, even if things did not work out for us. </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Black - Pearl Jam</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I know someday you'll have a beautiful life,<br />I know you'll be a sun in somebody else's sky, but why<br />Why, why can't it be, can't it be mine</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br />I dated an accountant for a while. I was instantly attracted to her because she was beautiful, extremely sweet and a lot of fun. I thought it would be good to try to date outside of the usual artistic type. I was self-employed at the time and was going through a rough patch financially and it really crushed me. I felt inferior since I couldn't even afford to take my girlfriend out to dinner or just generally spoil her the way I wanted to. I was a struggling photographer with an extremely time consuming art publication. I really felt like a loser and beat myself up mentally. I started to pull away from her because she couldn't understand where I was at and I found myself unable to explain it. I dug myself into depression and questioned everything about myself. By the time I tried to open up to her for emotional support it was too late. It really crushed me. I felt I ruined a great thing. We remained friends even though it was very hard on me. She had a sister that was married with the American standard: nice house, successful husband, and two kids. That is what she wanted and I was unable to provide that due to my lack of successful career, financial stress and no interest in kids. She married the next guy she dated. He got what she wanted, including two kids from his previous marriage. I called it the ‘just add water marriage’. My next girlfriend and I meet her and her husband for dinner once. He was a nice guy and they were very much in love. I am happy she found what she was looking for. For a short time I had wished it could have been me but space and time allows you amazing clarity.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Dirty Little War - Will Hoge<br /></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">take this tiny band of gold, for no more will it shine.<br />and everything that once was ours, is now just yours and mine.<br />so i'll take back my heart and i will give you back your name.<br />in 90 days, a judge downtown will take back 20 years of pain.<br />and don't be sorry 'cause i've heard that all before.<br />please don't try to justify 'cause nobody wins<br />in this dirty little war, this dirty little war.</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Great Divide</span></span></span></b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">- Vertical Horizon</span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I didn't know you and you didn't know me<br />Broken branches and a family tree<br />Blown over this wind is wide<br />A lone loner's, and our great divide<br /><br />And I know it's not forever<br />This time it's not the same<br />Why can't we live together<br />And share more than a name</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">No one wins in divorce. No matter what the reasons for demise are, no one has a pretty divorce. It is never easy and never fun. To dissect a life together is a very ugly event. When I was married we were together for only five months. The divorce took eight months to resolve. From dishes to dogs we separated what we had briefly built together. She left and she never came back. The emotional and financial recovery took me nearly three years. It is really hard to believe I duped myself into that situation. The last I heard she was in her twelfth rehab. I have only seen or spoken with her once since she left and that was at divorce court. She has tried to initiate contact with me many times over the years. I have no interest in opening the door to that part of my past. I can only assume she wants to be forgiven. She will have to work that one out on her own. It was the most devastating occurrence in my life other than losing my best friend of fifteen years to brain cancer.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">You Wanted More - Tonic<br /></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I don’t know when I got bitter<br />Love is sure better when it's gone<br />Because you wanted more<br />More than I could give<br />More than I could handle<br />And a life that I can't live<br /><br />You wanted more<br />More than I could bare<br />More than I could offer<br />And a love that isn't there</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Bent - Matt Nathanson</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">If I bent like you said was best<br />Would that change a thing?<br />If I spent myself what’s left<br />Would you still leave me here?</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Now that I am thirty-eight and have been dating for many years I have discovered that honesty is still the best policy. As much as it hurts to tell someone it is over, it feels good to be honest and explain why. I have never broken up with a woman without their best interest in mind. Dating is a process and I think we often take the failure of a relationship very personally. After my divorce, I was very in tune with what I was unable to give emotionally. After a period of losing myself in taking care of others I took my life back. Unfortunately, I overcompensated. I went through a very selfish stage and I briefly dated different women for almost two years. I justified my actions by stating up front to them that I was not looking for a relationship and that I just wanted to have fun. When they wanted more I broke it off. I was rude and inconsiderate. I have apologized for hurting their feelings. This was not a period I am proud of. I ended these relationships for the right reasons although I had done it incorrectly. I knew they deserved more and I was not going to be able to give them that. I feel honored to be forgiven and that they still think highly enough of me to call me a friend.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Breakeven - The Script<br /></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing<br />Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in<br />Cos I got time while she got freedom<br />Cos when a heart breaks no it don't break even<br /><br />Her best days will be some of my worst<br />She finally met a man that’s gonna put her 1st<br />While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping<br />Cos when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven<br /><br />What am I suppose to do when the best part of me was always you</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></i></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok<br />I'm falling to pieces</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I’ve been broken up with as many times as I have done it myself. It is difficult no matter which side you are on. I think the majority of the time one person makes a decision and knows it is coming long before the other does. Sometimes the lack of communication blindsides you with a swift ending to a relationship. At the time, we feel hurt and think they have it so much easier. Sometimes we have to be direct and honest and that leaves us wounded and defensive. We all grieve in different ways but no matter how you do it you still must have closure. Most often you must complete this task on your own. There always seems to be unanswered questions. Missing someone that was such a huge part of your life can be a struggle. Seeing them with someone new can easily send you into a tail spin. Replaying events and conversations in your head until you drive yourself crazy doesn’t help. I have thrown myself into work, physical activities, spending all my time with friends or family. Music has been my saving grace many times. I have spent time alone with my music therapy and it seems to be my best coping tool. Other than writing, I can escape into the music feeling the waves of the guitar pushing me and the vocals speaking to me. It sometimes allows me to get outside of my own head. It always helps to know that others have been in the same shoes and that the pain is just temporary.</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Consider This a Warning - Anna Nalick<br /></span></span></span></b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Consider this a warning<br />Cause I'll start another fight<br />And you'll say its all alright<br />I'll wait for the day when you find I'm too much for you, baby<br />So lay your hands over me<br />And feel what you only see<br />But don't bother wasting your time if you're trying to change me</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Many times what we find attractive about someone becomes the very thing we eventually hate. I know that we are often attracted to the wild side of others. Maybe they are more spontaneous, outgoing or intense than us. Opposites attract since gravitate to what we are not. I had never rolled from one relationship into another and in hindsight there are many reasons I had not done so before. It is very difficult to start something knew when you have no previous closure. It is better to wait until you have healed before you walk wounded into something new. She actually gave me a verbal warning. She told me that I might not be able to handle all the baggage she brought to the relationship. I was carrying plenty of my own at this time so I felt we were on a level playing field. Of course, I did not heed her warning. It was a wild ride with never a dull moment. But in the end she was right. It was too much for me. My mom told me, ‘You can’t change people but you can change your reaction to people.’ I did and we had a difficult break up. At least she knew herself well enough to give a warning. Follow your gut and trust your instincts. It is easier to be dragged down than to lift someone else up. A life boat won’t save a sinking ship. Again, we are still friends and I wish her the best. We all deserve to be happy.</span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Different - Acceptance</span></span></span></b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">I'm taking a chance, this could be different.<br />This could be all I'm waiting for.<br />Taking a chance, this could be different.<br />This could be all I'm waiting for.</span></i></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span></span></span></span></p><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Sometimes I fantasize about the future. In my mind I often see amazing possibilities, then expectations cause doubts. I get scared of failure and crush the hope I just had. If I meet someone right now that I felt very strongly about it would be the first time in ten years. I would love to experience an amazing instant connection. Unfortunately, the high of possibilities leads quickly to the low of doubt. I tend to second guess myself and it causes conflict. I can only compare it to a high of performing to a sold out arena. You can chase that high daily off stage but it will never be as pure as that time on stage. Due to the past I have sore spots and it is not easy to make it through the maze without touching on the past. There are too many variables in relationships to predict or control. By not asking someone out, you hold on to hope since you can’t fail if you don’t try. As long as I have been dating, it never seems to get easier. It is like the more I know about myself, the more I care, the more I want, the harder it is to put myself out there. No one wants to feel like a fool. I get nervous when I am really into someone. Even a phone call can be difficult. If I don’t say anything at all then I can’t sound stupid. If I am not that into her it is easier because there is nothing to lose. It is very confusing, as if I am constantly ending where I began. Eventually you have to just act without thinking. If things are meant to happen, they will. If you are true to yourself, then you can’t go wrong.</span></span></span><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /><br />During the mid-seventies I spent summers travelling the country in a Volkswagen van with my parents listening to Peter, Paul & Mary. Christopher Cross seeped from the speakers daily as we rode the bus to and from junior high school. Live, Pearl Jam and Blind Melon's first records take me back to late nights at my college radio station. </span></span></span><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Just a few months ago I spent a weekend on Kentucky Lake listening to Sublime as we danced on the water. </span></span></span><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Music burns memories in my mind connecting the past visually, audibly and emotionally. My mind is a jukebox of magical experiences playing infinitely.</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span> </span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">The heart is pure. The mind conflicts the heart. Press random and let the music play. </span></span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </div><div style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">By Trey Mitchell</span></b></span><br /><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></div><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"></span></p><p><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p><p style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-size:10pt;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p><p> </p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-54846684118325296032010-01-28T20:04:00.000-08:002010-01-28T20:09:21.747-08:00I Fall In Love All The Time<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 14px; font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;font-size:11px;"><b><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Love</span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br />· </span></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">Pronunciation: \ˈləv\<br />· Function: noun<br />· Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu</span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br />· a strong positive emotion of regard and affection<br />· any object of warm affection or devotion or admiration<br />· have a great affection or liking for<br />· used as terms of endearment<br />· get pleasure from<br />· a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction<br /><br /><br />I fall in love all the time…in my head.<br /><br />I know better to let my heart get involved. It is a long uphill climb on a slippery slope. When I ask myself what I want in a woman it is easier to answer what I don’t want. I have had what I don’t want. After all these years of long dead end roads, I could easily feel nothing. Yet I still have a romantic hidden inside, curled up naked protecting that dream of love.<br /><br />When I was younger I believed in ‘movie love’. Now that I am older and have experienced many attempts to discover that elusive love, I know that it does not exist. Although, I do believe in a realistic form of it is possible to achieve.<br /><br />Do you remember young love in high school when you never wanted that last goodnight kiss to end? When you could talk on the phone for hours about anything and nothing at all? To get a love note was such a personal rush and to finally declare that you were ‘going with’ someone was a monumental thrill!<br /><br />In adult form, these situations of emotional bliss still prevail. To get an unexpected text, email or voice mail ‘just to say hello’ is just as invigorating as finding that three cent prize in the bottom of that caramel coated popcorn. And that was when you were already I on a sugar high!<br /><br />So often it is the little things that mean so much. Let's say you are out of town and you stop at a little country store or even a truck stop and you buy some cheap little trinket to give her upon your return. It makes her laugh and she knows that you were thinking of her. Or maybe you are meeting new people and you have a great conversation you can’t wait to tell her about later. The last thing you want to hear is her voice before you go to sleep. And I could go on...<br /><br />It surprises even me that I am missing things that I have only been privileged enough to have a glimpse of. I must believe in real love or I have nothing to hope for. Does wishing for more money, a better job, a new car or a big house really bring happiness? When you are dying will you be telling stories on your death bed about that one summer in your mid thirties when you and your convertible Mercedes spent so much time cruising with the top down blaring ‘your song’? I don’t think so.<br /><br />One of my new favorite quotes is “Life is not measured by the breaths we take but the moments that take our breath away.” Is it so wrong to want to share irreversible and irreplaceable moments in time with someone so special that you can’t imagine your life without them?<br /><br />I know that there are beautiful, intelligent, genuine women with a great sense of humor that at the same time have self-worth, come from good families and want but don't need to be in a relationship. I have met a few. Unfortunately, someone had already shown them how amazing they are by expressing respect and love for them.<br /><br />I know some men relish in the idea of living the endless bachelor life of only responsibility for them. I wonder if the quick fix of the next woman they conquer is not just as much an addiction. Just as the aging rocker uses drugs and sex to constantly relive up the high of the adoration of thousands of people he doesn’t even know. Isn’t the short intense rush of cotton candy nothing in comparison to a full meal that satisfies you for much longer?<br /><br />When most of us were younger we had little knowledge and no fear. I hardly knew that the word consequence existed. In my mind, there was no failure and certainly no pain. Thinking usually occurred after the action. As we get older what were simple decisions are now convoluted with more choices and most often even larger consequences for our actions.<br /><br />From experience, I know that giving everything to the wrong person is worse than giving to no one at all. I think to be not alone, but with you is one of the most beneficial and courageous things we can do. I know in the end I just need to start with the basics...to be with someone that accepts me as I am and vice versa.<br /><br />It sure has seemed like a ghost hunt thus far...but maybe I am starting to believe in ghosts.</span></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#333333;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 14px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></span></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#333333;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 14px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><br /></span></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#333333;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" line-height: 14px;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b></span></span></div></div>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-14469657795864776842010-01-24T09:00:00.000-08:002010-01-24T09:05:06.906-08:00False Pretenses<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span lang="EN" style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Little girls don't know how to be sweet girls.<br />Mama didn't teach me.<br />Little boys don't know how to treat little girls.<br />Daddy didn't show me.<br /><br />Face down, on top of your bed.<br />Oh why did I give it up to you?<br />Is this how I shoot myself up high,<br />Just high enough to get through?<br /><br />Again, the false affection.<br />Again, we break down inside.<br />Love save the empty.<br />Love save the empty, and save me.</span></span></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span lang="EN" style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Erin </span></i></span></span><span lang="EN" style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">McCarley</span></i></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">I was talking with a woman recently when she expressed her frustration with men. She said that men get bored too easily and that she feels like women must hold back to create mystery or give in to sex to keep them. She said sex was too easy for men and went on to explain that she feels like ‘You have to give in to a home run for a guy to like you.’</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">This blew my mind. She is stunningly attractive, very sweet, and intelligent and possesses a great sense of humor.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">So what is the problem?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">She is dating the wrong kind of men.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">It is all about respect. Respect yourself and demand respect from men.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Men that chase women and then drop them after sex are about the conquest. They need to keep their ego pumped up. Men are only as faithful as their options. The truth is that women have all of the power yet they don’t seem to realize this.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Ultimately, women are in control. They have what we want. Set the tone and the rules. Demand to be treated the way you want and deserve to be. Men will respect you and your choices or they won’t. If they don’t care enough to not rush, then they lose but you don't. Men who are in a hurry just want sex. If you mean anything to them they will take the time to get to know you and allow you to feel safe and comfortable. Sex can be a very personal, private, even sacred experience.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Most often sex complicates things, especially when you really don’t know the person. Most likely each of you has different expectations that you are unaware of. Personally, I want, expect and deserve more than just sex. I still think there is chase and intrigue if you want it. However, it takes self-control from both of you to achieve it.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">There is something very sexy about being patient and cerebral, like in a chess game. The unknowing and the anticipation is stimulating. You must be persistent yet still allow opportunity to make the right moves at the right time.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">If a woman jumps into bed with a man right away it most likely and hardly ever will progress or develop into anything else. Men know this. Easy in and easy out. If you have to work to get there you are more likely to stay.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">There is something satisfying about knowing you can have someone but not doing so. You keep your dignity and respect and there is no failure of expectations while avoiding potential drama.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Why would you spend time, money and effort to put on a show to try to impress someone you hardly know if all you wanted was sex? A woman recently told me that her new boyfriend takes her out and they enjoy spending time together. I said that was great and that is what it is all about, enjoying each other’s company. She said most guys she has dated failed to do that. What!?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">It baffles me that any women let this behavior fly. So if a man wants to do a little as possible to get sex then it is acceptable? On the flip side, I don’t think it is cool to make men jump through hoops and break the bank either. If you like someone then it is simple. I think it is wrong to want to always get something even if you are not that interested. The balance of give and take works for a reason. Really, why waste your time or theirs if it is not genuine?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">In these situations, I think people put their best foot forward but it often seems fake to me. I think one needs to earn attention by showing true interest and spending time getting to know the other. To fully enjoy the dating process you must show mutual respect.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Unfortunate but true, most beautiful women are judged initially by their looks. If you don’t have much else to offer you will be treated with a shallow level of respect. If you have personality to back up your looks you will be treated with more respect. I am not talking about just being a ‘fun girl’. I mean real personality in the form intelligence, witty sense of humor, interests in anything with depth. Beautiful people often sell themselves short. Why develop other parts when they have never had to? When all the focus is on their exterior why not take the path of least resistance?</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">If you want to be a sex doll, be one but don’t pretend you are anything else. Don’t be offended if people judge you. If you want to blame society for pressuring you into having sex to keep a boyfriend, so be it. Society is not there when you decide to or not to have sex. No matter who you are be true to yourself and don’t apologize.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">You project the way you think of yourself and that is the way others will treat you. If you want more, then be more and demand more.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">Respect is something you earn.</span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;"> </span></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span lang="EN" style="font-family:Arial;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#9999FF;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;font-size:100%;"> </span></p><p> </p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-33120278926970938662010-01-23T09:23:00.000-08:002010-01-23T09:28:44.483-08:00Bail Outs<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" ;font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">In a time when we can easily and quickly make contact with anyone anywhere there is still a lack of communication.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> Yet all the gizmos and gadgets can never replace true face to face communication.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Thanks to Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, email, IM, texting, video, photos and voice mails along with acronyms and emoticons we are losing touch with being in touch. There is still nothing like seeing a facial expression and hearing a tone of voice. Misunderstandings are caused by not listening. We are too distracted by too many variables that should be irrelevant. The next time you reach out to someone, chances are that you will be misunderstood.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">I am constantly hearing stories of how the most intimate of situations have been demoted to what is easier and faster. I cannot fathom that people break up via, email, voice mails, text messages, or even post it notes! Seriously, is this what we have come to!? People, grow up and take responsibility for your actions! Otherwise, the love of the land is lawless and full of anarchy! What makes it worse it that these lazy and impersonal methods are being perpetuated by the media, music, videos, TV and film. Do we now live in a world where it is ok to just slow the car, jump, tuck and roll?</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Break ups are not fun for either party. Unfortunately, most of us need closure and in most cases one of the two decides it is over in their mind before even stating so. So, 'Man up!', even if you are a woman. Show some respect and pull the plug in person. I believe in karma and so should you. So treat people with the respect that you feel you also deserve.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">If you are so terrible at breaking up with someone here are a few suggestions:</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">First, I think it is important to pick a neutral location. In a less familiar environment people tend to stay more in control. This way there is no history surrounding you as if you were at your place or hers. Secondly, have a time limit in your head. You don't want this to turn into a marathon discussion. Dragging it out too long will only confuse things.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Say, 'We need to talk'</span></b></div><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">By now we have all been there and there is no perfect time to say those four words. While you may think a 'heads up' is nice, most often it is an excruciating time for the other person. If you have too much time to cover your side of the conversation before hearing a thing they have to say it is a one-sided conversation. It make even spark them to try to talk right then which is never good while out in public, while at work or with friends or relatives. Make sure you keep private matters private.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never During a Fight</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Even if you have to walk away, don't blurt out that you want out then. Plus, if you have had arguments before and one of you has said it before neither will take it seriously. Say what you mean and do what you say. After you both have cooled down and had time to think, calmly sit down and discuss things as the adults that you are. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Hit Replay</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">There is no need to rehash your entire relationship. At this point it is over, you are not trying to work things out. It is normal to question things but at this point there is no going back. You can not turn back time and change the past. There is no reason to drive yourself crazy trying to figure out what went wrong, how you could have prevented it, see red flags you missed and so on. Simply learn from your mistakes and move on. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Cry</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Crying is an honest reaction, but don't allow yourself to be manipulated into changing your mind. You can comfort them but stand your ground. Don't let their pain cause you guilt. Also, don't join in on the crying session. One of you has to steady the course and stay on track. You have valid reasons so try your best to honestly and kindly explain.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Point Fingers</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">There is no point to go in swinging. Never point fingers and say 'You'. Explain things from your perspective. It is never good to provoke them or make them feel cornered, they will quickly become defensive. Then you have to spend time talking them down. Calmly discuss how you feel and your perspective. Make sure you listen to what they have to say because their feelings matter too. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Counter-Argue</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">They may dispute anything you've said or done, including examples you used in your reasons for breaking up. This is just a form of denial and they may frantically grasp at anything to throw you of course. Let them know that arguing isn't going to change your decision.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Allow Threats</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">When people are hurt they sometimes lash out at others to make themselves feel better. A few examples may be: "You'll never find anyone as good as me", "I'll make you regret this", "I knew you were an asshole", and "My friends never liked you". Threats of physical harm are serious so don't ignore them. If you're physically compromised, stay calm and leave quickly.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Never Make Empty Promises</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">No matter how much you care for someone, saying what they want to hear never offer white lies to ease the pain. You don't want to give them false hope. It's not going to help the situation. You must be firm but gentle. They may offer to fix things or to do things different but if you've discussed problems in the past and there was no change then it is too late.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br />There is no perfect formula for the perfect break up. Someone always gets let down even when it is treated in a calm, mature and respectful manner. However, it is very important to take this daunting task to heart and treat them as you would want to be treated. Nothing will ever replace face to face interaction. It is the most sincere of communications. It allows the act to seem more like a mutual discussion and allows one step closer for you both to have closure.<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Eventually the smoke will clear and you will have to time to reflect on the situation and realize you did the right thing for both of you. You now have more time to yourself so you can get back to the things you neglected, reconnect with friends, find new hobbies, etc.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Dating is a process and I think sometimes we take it too personally when things do not work out. We often feel like something, someone or ourselves are to blame. Blame is lame. Things just don't always work out. The stars didn't align, the timing was off or it just wasn't meant to be. You can't force a happy outcome.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">Getting into a relationship is the best part but when it all collapses getting out is never fun. Yet in time, 'Game Over' no longer fazes us. We will continue to shovel in quarters no matter how well we play the game.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#66CCCC;">By Trey Mitchell</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 54.7pt; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 36.7pt; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 54.7pt; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span> </span></p><p> </p></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-90025119860906596032010-01-20T12:52:00.000-08:002010-01-20T12:57:35.089-08:00Not All Bags Ride for Free<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 0px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 0px; font-family:arial;font-size:small;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><br /></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I kept falling over<br />I kept looking backward<br />I went broke believing<br />That the simple should be hard<br /><br />All we are we are</span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">And every day is a start of something beautiful</span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><br /></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">All We Are - Matt Nathanson</span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Arial;"></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><i><br /></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><br /></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We all have baggage. Some have more than others. I don't think you ever get over some things but you learn how to deal with them. It is freeing to leave some things behind. Knowing where, why and how is the key.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Life is constantly throwing us curve balls. We try to keep things in perspective and under control but there are always things we can’t control. So we learn to deal with the unexpected. Sometimes the unexpected brings situations that result in unwanted feelings. Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. Often people in our lives disappoint us. However, you can’t change people but you can change your reaction to them.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">If you have lived life at all, you have experienced the extreme highs and lows. Unfortunately, lows are part of life but we can gain strength from it. There is something heroic about overcoming adversity. It builds character. I would rather bear the load of knowledge than run with the lightness of inexperience.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I had four years that crushed me emotionally, physically and financially. I wanted to move away to start over. I thought maybe out West or even Europe. I needed to clear my head and just shed all the places and things that reminded me of the most recent and worst years of my life. But thankfully fear of the unknown kept me in one place long enough to realize that no matter where you run to the baggage goes with you. So I decided to stay and sort my life out so I could get a fresh start when I was ready. I am glad I did since it took me longer to clean the slate than I would have even imagined. You have the keys to lock away the past.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I had never been to California before and it was one of the few states I had not been to. I went two weekends back to back. The first was to Southern California to make some serious decisions about my future and the next was to Northern California to clear my head and make a plan as a result of my choices. Sometimes a different perspective allows us to see things in more clearly.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">During that second weekend in California I played out different scenarios. Would it be healthy to leave my support network of friends and family? Was it smart to try to start over all on my own in a new city looking for a new job with no friends? Did I need to be alone to regain my life? Isolation is not always the answer. Why try to start over and take unresolved issues with you?</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Not all bags ride for free. Think of a relationship as a one passenger plane. Yet a relationship usually consists of more than one person. There is only enough room for luggage or the other passenger. So what if there is too much baggage to leave it behind? There is always a choice and usually a sacrifice.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Be comfortable with who you are and make peace with where you have been. Forgive yourself and others. You have to release negativity or it will eat you up inside. Life is short, blame is lame. Some things change you forever but you can control if it is for the better or worse. You can choose to see things positively or not. It is amazing how resilient we have the ability to be. Experiences can make you richer than money can.<br /></span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">Today does not know yesterday; tomorrows are not built on what would have, could have or should have been.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><b><span style="font-family:Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:9pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0in; "><span style=" ;font-family:Arial;font-size:9pt;"> </span></p></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-60446548179992005282010-01-15T12:18:00.001-08:002010-01-15T12:21:16.920-08:00Learn And Live<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 14px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CC0000;"><br /></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CC0000;">There was a man that had many short relationships.<br />He had been hurt and he had the scars to remind him.<br />So he always wanted to have fun. That is until things turned<br />serious. To him serious meant no fun. So he started to<br />develop a technique where he said up front that the<br />relationship would go nowhere. He subconsciously<br />picked women he would have no future with. Then he<br />consciously made it clear that he was not willing to give<br />beyond a specific point. So he continued to have fun and always<br />had his on the rip cord for a quick and safe exit. He did so<br />until he became too old to fit in and they too young to<br />impress him. He became 'that guy' in the bar. So he was alone.<br /><br />There was a couple together for nine years. After the first<br />two years they became unhappy. They were either too scared<br />to end it due to not wanting to hurt the other person<br />or were just too scared to be alone…or maybe both.<br />The last 5 or 6 yrs they simply cohabitated. They fought<br />a lot. They began to walk on egg shells as<br />to not rock the boat. They got in the habit of going out<br />more and getting drunk so they had a life outside<br />of the house. They just masked the situation<br />by acting happy and festive in public. At least while<br />they were around others they did not fight. But after being<br />numb for so long they called it quits. So they were alone.<br /><br />Maybe the single guy never gave anyone a chance and never tried.<br />Maybe the couple should have admitted they saw the red flags.<br /><br />Until we have been there how can we judge?<br /><br />If we did what the clique suggests, we would be walking forever in others shoes.<br /><br /></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CC0000;">by Trey Mitchell</span></b></span></span></span>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-71413201750044285212010-01-15T12:07:00.000-08:002010-01-15T12:13:49.515-08:00Duped<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#CC66CC;"><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Ok, this one is for the guys. Ladies, feel free to read on if you dare. </span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> </span></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Let's say you meet a beautiful, funny and affectionate woman through friends one night. You hit it off and have an absolute blast. You exchange numbers and talk for hours the next day. You realize how close you have come to meeting several times and both wish you had met years ago. Her friends rave about how amazing she is and you agree. Your mutual friends even mention that she thinks that you are 'cute', 'nice' and cool'. You join her and her friends out several times. She is affectionate towards you around others and you always laugh and have fun. You enjoy emailing and texting during the first couple of weeks. Then you meet her one on one during the day to show her you are interested in getting to know her. She seems distant and uninterested. Also, she doesn't seem to remember things you have discussed and potential plans you have made. She cuts your hang time short citing that she must get her laundry right away before she puts it off. Finally, a hurried impersonal goodbye leaves you standing in wondering what happened. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">We are guys, so it could have been something we said, did or didn't say or do. More than likely we just weren't prepared for which type of woman we were dealing with. Like a good comedian, know your audience. So here is some information to keep you from feeling like the rug has been pulled out from under you. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">In my opinion, there are three main types of women. Ladies I am not saying that every woman fits in one of these broad categories but these are the ones that instantly came to mind. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">You Wish:</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> I could have him if I wanted to. The ones that need the attention by having men fall all over her so she feels superior. There is nothing like having your pick of the flock. Control is power. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">It starts with physical appearance. When a women is beautiful all of her life she gets special treatment everywhere she goes. She does not have to prove her self in any way. She really doesn't even need to develop any part of her personality. Why would she need to when she does nothing and gets everything she wants? She is bored with men because she is always the center of attention. She turns heads when she walks in rooms. She has heard every line, every compliment, every story and every joke. Don’t let her fool you, she loves the attention and without it she would be lost. She usually dates men that are the typical cliché of tall, dark and handsome. She is most attracted to men of power that have money to impress. She enjoys the carefree life of always being at the cool new place to be seen, hanging out with her attractive friends, never having to buy drinks and never having to be alone. She is the woman women and men love to hate. 'Don’t hate me because I am beautiful.' Her biological gift is used to its fullest and much of depth in life is overlooked by her. She was born into privilege. She was the head cheerleader and prom queen. She expects you to fulfill her every desire, since cost is no option. You can't blame her for the way she is since she has knows no other way. She is the face of everything that sells. She can always be attracted to the next big thing. She is your fantasy. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Misunderstood:</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> She can't understand why men always pursue her when she has given them no reason to think she is interested in them. She explains how she has such a big heart and just loves everyone. She digs you but not like 'that'. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">She is the unknowingly unattainable. She is so cool, sweet, fun and attractive that you think you have an opportunity to date an amazing woman. You were stunned and happily surprised to meet such a woman. No matter how downplayed whatever you heard about her was, nothing compares to how blown away you where when you meet her. She is always positive, affectionate and entertaining. She always gives you attention and is appreciative of compliments. She is always dressed well and always looks beautiful; she has no bad hair days. You make her feel safe and comfortable. She is the one that other men see you with and wonder what you possibly have that they don't. At first women are threatened by her but everyone loves her, men and women alike. She is harmless and very loveable. She is surrounded by other beautiful people but you know she has more depth then half of them. She could easily be shallow but thinks more of herself than to cheat herself like that. She likes to look and feel beautiful but does not use her looks in a malicious or self-centered manner. Unfortunately, she is only interested in a specific type of man. You might never even know what type of man that is. She never calls you by your name but instead uses substitute words like 'dude', 'buddy' and 'man'. She talks of plans but she is always too busy to follow through and you can never find any reason to be upset with her when she doesn't. She is the type of woman you would do anything for then later realize you compromised too much of yourself to please her. When you 'hang out' she never allows you to pay for anything since that would make it a 'date'. She is too good to be true. She could be everything you want if she just let you in. You don't have to have the winning hand but you must be close. She is your 'if only'. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">Aloof:</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"> 'Seriously, he likes me?' This is rarest type of women. She has no idea how amazing she is. She is always shocked that men are interested in her. She is intrigued by the fact that men are so drawn to her. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">She is most often overlooked for more outgoing and typically beautiful women. She is smart, witty, independent, grounded, goal oriented and beautiful in a classic timeless way. She always looks pretty without even trying. She can easily leave the house in jeans, t-shirt and a ball cap. When she does dress up she is stunning because she downplays her looks. She is well rounded and will try almost anything for the experience. She is the type of women that others look up to although they usually won't admit it. She is comfortable with herself and can be anywhere with anyone and have a good time. She is a woman that will always develop and grow mentally and emotionally. To her life is a challenge and well worth it because nothing good comes easily. She doesn't look down on others because she understands why people are the way they are. She defends those that others refuse to take the time to understand. She impresses mom and dad and your friends tell you she is the best things that could ever happen to you. She will accept you for who you are. She is the 'one that got away'. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">One you must be of her stock or you have no chance. If you are not, you can never truly understand the world she lives in. Two represents that it could happen to you. If you are lucky you might just hit the jackpot. Three is the woman of the real world. She is for you but you have to prove yourself worthy. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">So what type of woman fits you? Ladies, it is not all your fault but please communicate with us so we don't allow ourselves to feel duped. Be honest with us, we will get over it. If we can't take it then it is our problem not yours. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;"><br /></span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#3366FF;">by Trey Mitchell </span></b></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;font-size:100%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:13px;"><br /></span></span></div></div>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7998863264480331571.post-79458134080887239372010-01-15T11:58:00.000-08:002010-01-15T12:03:28.436-08:00Give It a Rest<span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><div><br /></div>A vacation is like hitting the reset button. Every time I leave, I come back with a sense of renewal. There is nothing like physically and mentally stepping outside of your daily life. It is hard to get a fresh and true perspective when you are too close to the large canvas on which you are painting your life. </span></span></span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">It is easy to overlook simple things in life when we are easily distracted by daily tasks. Work, bills, kids, money, stress, etc, often overshadow the fact that we have more freedom than we realize. I remember when I was self-employed and was stressing over living hand to mouth when a friend demonstrated an example of living in the moment and being grateful. After a few minutes upon arriving at his house he abruptly said, ‘Follow me.’ We exited his home and walked across the street where he sat on a small hill. He told me to sit with him as he stared slightly over the trees. We sat in silence for a few minutes then he turned to me and said, ‘This moment, right here, right now will never be the same.’ I must admit I was a little miffed. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">He went on to point out the changing of the leaves, as it was Fall. The leaves were their most vibrant of colors just before they fell from the trees. The reds and yellows were picturesque. Basically, he was illustrating that we were witnessing a moment in time that could never be duplicated or relived. A few days later things would look completely different but we took the time to notice and enjoy the wonder of nature as the season changed. I instantly was less stressed and more calm. Such a simple break from self-absorption opened my eyes to the fact that we are so small and that so much exists outside of each of us. There is a difference between looking and seeing. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I recently took a trip to Denver to see a friend for his birthday. It is amazing that in these economic times, I was not only able to afford to but physically able to step onto a plane and in two hours be miles across the country. While I was there we took a trip out to Red Rocks which is roughly thirty minutes outside of the city. It is this amazing outdoor venue that has hosted events from music to film since the early 1900’s. The red color of the rock is due to the combination of the amount of iron and the natural weathering. It is no Grand Canyon but it is amazing what nature can do. Both are great illustrations of how small we are. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">We all know right now times are tough. They are probably the worst I have seen in my lifetime, yet it is no Great Depression. There are many areas that are doing far worse than we are. In fact, there is always someone who has it worse than you. I had a horrific run of four years a while back and I am lucky I made it through. Once the smoke cleared I have not looked at things the same way. Suddenly the simple things meant so much. It reminded me how fortunate I am and that it could always be worse. I know my experiences pale in comparison to others but I certainly walked away with a new refreshed view on life. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">I may not have a successful photography or writing career and I may have not found the love of my life, but I am thankful to even have a job when so many don't right now. Stability in an unstable world is monumental to well being. So much of it is about simply having a positive attitude. So often we get caught up in what we don't have instead of what we do. I know the American mentality is to want more, bigger, better, faster, etc but we also need to take a break and enjoy what we have. I may be a contradiction to the traditional American dreamer as I am trying to enjoy life along the way instead of killing myself to gain all I can then retire and enjoy it when I am old. What is the point in having when you don't enjoy it until later? </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">In the spirit of the month of traditional Thanksgiving I urge you to take a non-traditional vacation. It doesn’t have to be a costly trip to a far away place. Take a walk in the park, take a leisure drive in the country, or go to a movie by yourself. Be thankful for all the things you take for granted. There is nothing like loss to make you regret not appreciating what you had all along. In a temporary, uncontrollable and unpredictable world be aware that the very idea of a vacation is a luxury. </span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:arial, sans-serif;color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;font-size:small;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style=" border-collapse: collapse; white-space: pre-wrap; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; font-family:arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"></span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">By Trey Mitchell</span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#FF6666;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span></div>trey mitchellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16397905318837929481noreply@blogger.com0